Free Tied Up in Knots by Mary Calmes

Ian, but he was obviously so excited, so over the moon, that he could barely stand it, and as a result, he was doing a really good kangaroo impersonation. The height he was reaching was impressive.
    Up and down, over and over, the epitome of joyful delight.
    Stupid dog.
    Ian did a slow turn, and Chickie whimpered and whined, stopped hopping for a second and made a circle, singing to his master in a sweet low howl he normally saved for serenading Sajani before he put his front paws on Ian’s shoulders and licked his face all over.
    The chuckle that came out of me was involuntary, but watching Chickie bounce around, there was no way to keep a straight face.
    “Get down,” Ian grumbled as he petted his wet dog and tried to wipe rain and dog slobber off his face with his own dripping sleeve.
    “You should take a shower,” I told him. “I’ll come down and dry off Chick.”
    His head snapped up. “How could you just say—”
    “How could you,” I fired back, leaning over the railing. “That was bullshit and you know it, but you said it anyway because you’re mad at the situation and taking that crap out on me.”
    His glare was dark.
    “I’ve never once said I didn’t want you, not ever. Do I get the whole putting yourself in danger all the time? No, I don’t. Do I get you signing up to be away from me? No, I don’t get that either,” I growled. “What I do get is that you feel like you have to because you’re the only one who can. And even though I think that’s a helluva lot of ego there—because I’m betting there are others just as trained up as you—I get that if something ever were to happen and you weren’t there, you’d feel guilty for the rest of your life.”
    “Ego?”
    I made a noise in the back of my throat and turned to go to the bathroom. “Fine, if that’s your only takeaway, I—”
    “Don’t you dare move!”
    “Then listen to me, for fuck’s sake!” I yelled at him as I turned.
    He threw up his hands in reply.
    “Where the combat is concerned, yeah, I think that’s your ego at work,” I retorted, not backing down. “Because the only place you’re not replaceable, where no one else will do, is right here with me. Here, at home—you’re it, and if you’re too stupid to—”
    “Shut up,” he rasped, his jaw clenching as he inhaled a breath through his nose.
    I crossed my arms and waited.
    “I’m a soldier.”
    I was going to tell him I knew that already, but he lifted a hand to keep me quiet.
    “First before anything, that’s what I am,” he ground out, flicking his gaze up to meet mine. “It’s not going to change.”
    “But that doesn’t mean that’s all you are because you yourself have told me it’s not.”
    It took him a moment before he gave me a nod. “Yeah, that’s true.”
    “And I know you’re not going to change being a soldier.” That hurt. It did. I felt in my heart that he wouldn’t stop doing it for me on the chance his commitment could mean his death. I was certainly taking a backseat to his military career, if I chose to think of it that way. But the other way to see Ian’s choice was through his eyes. Being a Green Beret was part of who he was, long before he met me. It was what made Ian, Ian. His promise to his country meant the world to him, and who was I to make him give that up? And if he didn’t do it, would he still be the man I loved?
    “Miro?”
    I refocused on him.
    “Do you still want me if this is your life?”
    I scowled at him and I saw him swallow, watched his throat work, from where I was.
    “Yes, Ian,” I replied soberly, feeling the tightening in my jaw, the burn behind my eyes. “I want you, and that’s never gonna change.”
    He stood below me, not moving, simply giving me his patented blank stare.
    “But let’s not pretend I don’t care and that I’m happy about it. You’re the one who’s gotta think, is this going to be too hard for me to know that; yes, he supports me, but he hates it when I’m