Free Icon of the Indecisive by Mina V. Esguerra Page B

felt familiar, and right, and it was exactly like the goddess dreams but better because it was him and me...
    A heartbeat later we both became aware that we weren't alone there anymore, and that Robbie had come in only to hear the last thing Quin said, but it was all he needed. Suddenly the fear in my stomach multiplied, as the worst of Robbie's suspicions came true for him, and I disentangled myself from Quin but not fast enough.
    "Ms. Farrah told me you were here," Robbie said, his voice tense and bitter. "Are you all right?"
    I saw myself as he saw me. My bruises were gone. All he could see was me in tears, sitting up on a clinic bed, in someone else's arms.
    "I'll be okay," I said.
    "Good," he said, and he slammed the door on his way out.
    Quin swore and kicked something under the bed. "I could have prevented that. I was..."
    Distracted. He was distracted. So some things did slip between the cracks sometimes. So there were cracks after all.
    "I'll fix it," he said, and he started after Robbie.
    "Don't mess with his memory," I said, without thinking, and that made Quin pause.
    "Are you sure?"
    Was I sure? Robbie could forget all of this in a moment. "Yes," I said. "I should talk to him. Properly."
    As (interim) Goddess of Love I knew I should help Robbie long for the truth. I owed him that much.
    Besides, I might not be goddess for much longer.
     

Chapter 21
     
    He knew it all along, of course. In the way that people retroactively "knew it all along" because they just kept themselves in denial the whole time.  
    Last year, Robbie told himself, only ask her out in senior year. By then Quin would be out of here, and she wouldn't need to tutor him anymore, and that would be one less thing to worry about. At least, he used to worry about it more often. He already swung too much between obsessing and not obsessing about that friendship.
    Because that's all it was, she said, and he believed her. Most of the time.
    Senior year would be better, he thought. Quin would be gone, and Robbie would probably be captain by then, in case she went for that kind of thing. Of course that meant if things went well then they'd only have a year left in school together, but he lived near Ford River enough that he could probably continue to visit her post-graduation, as long he lived with his parents.
    Or he could get a job in one of the technoparks near Ford River. But that wasn't going to solve the problem of what would happen after she graduated, and moved back to her mother's house in Manila. But he could always find a job in the metro.
    Assuming things went well.
    He didn't mind the slow pace he was on, at first. Robbie felt that Hannah was into that. Quin started the friend thing with her when she was a freshman, and it looked like he kept it that way for an entire year. (He would have heard locker room talk if he went further. He heard locker talk about everything else.) 
    But there was also the matter of Quin assuring him that he and Hannah were just friends. He actually said it. Robbie didn't even remember asking, but Quin just suddenly said it, and also that she didn't have a boyfriend, which felt like being caught revealing a secret by talking in his sleep. So that was one time when he temporarily stopped obsessing over it. Quin wasn't a liar, that much he knew.  
    And he still thought that when, on February 12, Diego approached him while he was in the library with a pile of readings on Risk, and said, "If you want the girl, you should do something about it. Before Quin nails her."
    Why would he even say that? But Robbie had seen this before. They'd be best buds one day, and Diego would be hassling Quin the next. 
    "They're just friends," he said.
    "Yeah, they said that, right? Because Quin's never lied before. And you know she'll say no if he ever tried it." Sarcasm. If you had to deal with Diego on a daily basis, you'd get more than your recommended serving of it.
    "Isn't Quin seeing that teacher?"
    Diego didn't answer, but