Free Dark Foundations by Chris Walley Page A

giving God orders . He rebuked himself. But he kept praying and as he did, he slowly saw beyond his own wishes. Soon the answer was plain.
    â€œI’d better get back to work,” he said aloud. Taking out his diary, he began making notes on matters to do with organization and structure for the FDF.
    Twenty minutes later, he looked up and Perena was there. With a single fluid motion, she sat on the grass next to him.
    â€œSo, have you saved the world yet, Vero?” she asked. Her levity seemed artificial. Indeed, she looked as if she had been crying.
    â€œNot yet, Miss P. I have other things on my mind.” Face-to-face with her, he felt his resolve slipping.
    Perena gave a tiny nod. “Vero—,” she began.
    â€œNo, let me,” he interrupted, wanting to get the words out before he could think the better of them. “I’m not sure the time is right for . . . anything more between us.” There! I’ve said it!
    He saw the relief on her face.
    â€œAh,” she said slowly. “My conclusion, most reluctantly, was the same—that we should just be good friends. The best of friends . . . but no more. For the moment.”
    â€œThis just isn’t my day, is it? Nor the last two days. First, I lose my lift home, and now I get my hopes dashed.” He knew his attempts at humor seemed artificial. The sadness was too near the surface. “But I’m not going to argue. It’s what I felt. I’m lonely and—to be honest—I’m scared and a relationship with you would brighten my life. But that’s not the right reason, is it?”
    â€œNo,” she said. “But a pity. I was hoping you would argue me into it.” But in her eyes he saw a warning: Don’t try!
    Perena took a deep breath and leaned forward, hugging her knees. “I think we have to bear in mind that our world is now unstable. Sin has crept back and relationships are being distorted. I don’t really understand what happened with my sister and Merral. In some ways I don’t want to know. That’s their business. But it indicates the way things are going. If what happened can happen to them, then it can happen between us. We never used to worry about such things; we assumed it would all work out. We need to be careful. Do I make myself plain?”
    â€œYes.”
    â€œThere’s something else. The day before yesterday, perhaps twenty-five people died to seize that ship. We thought its destruction was the end; we now know it may be the beginning of problems to come.” She breathed deeply, as if in pain. “Vero, they made a sacrifice. I don’t know if I’m expressing this well, but . . . but we may have to do the same. We must be realistic. If there is an attack—a proper attack—then we pilots will bear the brunt of it. We can maybe muster a dozen ships that might be used in any space defense. And twenty, maybe thirty pilots.”
    With no armor—and so far—no weapons.
    â€œAnd if that is what lies ahead,” she went on, “then it’s going to be hard, because I love life. But if I was committed to someone, it might be almost impossible to do what I might have to do.”
    Vero looked at the grass. It’s a good way of hiding your feelings .
    â€œOne of the things . . . ,” he began, then realized that the words he started to say bore little resemblance to the painful intensity of what he felt. “Let’s start again. One of the things that I really like about you, Perena, is your ability to see beyond surface things.”
    â€œAnd I admire your ingenuity.”
    â€œIt’s a dangerous gift.” He paused. I have to respond to what she has said . “P., Perena, the only problem is . . . the way you’ve said it and the way that you’ve handled things has increased, rather than decreased, the attraction I feel for you.”
    â€œSorry.”
    â€œBut when it’s all over, can