Free Dawn of Darkness (Daeva, #1) by Daniel A. Kaine Page B

asked to see him. He
was so happy to see her, but she had another boy with her. A new
boyfriend."
    Ash's
arms began to twitch. His head buried into the nape of my neck, and
I felt the slightest trickle run across my skin. "She wanted to
show me how little I meant to her. She wanted to watch as her new
boyfriend beat me up. They called me a freak, and a monster. He
started hitting me and I let him. That's when the ice
came."
    The
trickle turned into a steady stream. I rolled over to face him and
meet his eyes, their sparkle hidden behind a veil of tears. God,
I'd been so selfish and stupid. All those times he tried to get me
to open up and help me with my pain, and I denied him. All the
times I saw his pain surface, and I did nothing, thinking only of
myself and my desire to keep a distance between us. I was a
horrible friend.
    "They were right," he sobbed. I
lifted a hand to his cheek, wiping away the tears with my thumb. It
hurt inside, like a knife twisting deep within me, to see Ash like
that. He was supposed to be happy and carefree. Not this.
    "You're not a monster," I said.
"You are anything , but a monster. You're a good person and they didn't
deserve you. I don't deserve you."
    "Don't
say that."
    "Why not?
It's true. All I've ever done is wallow in my self-pity. I saw you
were hurting deep down, and I ignored it. A good friend would have
done anything to try and make it better."
    "But you
have done something." He gave me a weak smile. "This. Right here.
You're the only person I've told willingly about what I did. You're
here for me now, and that means a lot to me."
    "What
else can I do?"
    "Trust
me," he said. "Tell me what bothers you so much, so I can help
you."
    I sighed
and looked away from him, turning to face the ceiling. Whether it
was the alcohol or a sense of duty to Ash that made me open up, I
don't know. "Everybody leaves me. My parents, Mrs. Rousseau, the
kids at the orphanage, foster parents... everyone. There's
something wrong with me, and it makes everyone leave me. I don't
know if I could go through that again."
    "I get it
now. You're scared to get close to anyone, because you think
they'll leave you."
    I nodded.
"It scares me, you know, how close I've gotten to you without
realising it. I tried to push you away at first, but you kept
coming back. Truth is, deep down I was happy that someone wanted to
be my friend." Now it was my turn with the tears, my eyes starting
to fill up. "But I'm scared I'll wake up one day, and you'll be
gone too. I don't know what I'd do if you were gone."
    Without
Ash, I honestly believed I would have nothing. Lucas, Brad,
Katiya... I considered them friends, but not in the way Ash was my
friend. They didn't understand me like Ash did. He was my only real
close-friend. He got me in a way that no-one else did, and now I
understood why. Ash had been through his own hell, and had his own
pain to show for it. The thought of him being gone was too much to
even think about.
    "Shh,
it's all right," he said, one hand running through my hair. "I'm
not going anywhere." He leaned in to plant a kiss on my forehead.
"Do you want me to sleep with you tonight?"
    I nodded
and turned away from him. His chest moulded against the line of my
back and his arm reached over to take my hand in his.
    "I won't
leave you," he whispered. "Not ever. You can count on
it."
    I lay
there, afraid to move. I felt the rise and fall of Ash's chest, his
breath ghosting over my skin. His heart beat against me, slowing as
he drifted off. Nothing has to change, I thought, his words echoing
in the back of my mind. I didn't believe him. Something had already
changed, and I wasn't sure if we'd be able to turn back now. A
sudden wave of fear washed over me. Ash's hand gripped mine
tighter. It was as if he was trying to comfort me, even in
sleep.
    He's
still here, I thought. And in that moment, it was
enough.
     
     

Chapter
6
    From the
moment I opened my eyes the next morning, I knew something was
wrong. For one thing,