Free Journey to Wubang 01 - Earth to Hell by Kylie Chan Page B

Southern Shen and I have been incontact for about ten years. We’re arranging a conference in a neutral territory, probably Antarctica. As soon as we contact the Western, African and North and South American Shen we’ll start making arrangements. We’ll probably do it when Ah Wu’s back and he can do the security in conjunction with each group’s people. We’ll thrash out a reciprocal agreement.’
    ‘Not North, South, East and West Shen?’ I said.
    ‘No, the Eastern and Western thing is just for convenience,’ the Jade Emperor said. ‘Actually, each continent has its own Shen, divided by the ocean or desert. So there aren’t actually any Northern Shen, unless you count Ah Wu who is the essence of the North itself.’ He shrugged. ‘Hardly anybody lives up there anyway—people there fit into their own region. So basically it will be a meeting of Shen from the six continents, and when we get together we’ll probably start formal naming and reciprocal diplomatic arrangements.’
    ‘What, Shen UN?’ I said.
    The Jade Emperor made a soft sound of amusement. ‘Yes. Now that travelling between the Corners is becoming common, we need to deal with the matter of mortals attaining Immortality in a Centre outside their own. If they choose to reside in a different Celestial Plane, the option to do so should be open to them. Leo is a classic example of this; he is in the first hundred or so black people who have been through our Hell, and the first to gain Immortality in our Centre. Until now, we have had very little contact with other Celestials. The time has come that we should make an arrangement for free movement between the Planes.’
    ‘The demons are moving as well,’ I said. ‘Look at these stone things.’
    ‘ Precisely ,’ the Emperor said with feeling. ‘Mixing Western mystical stones with Eastern demons. And the biotech that One Two Two was experimenting with…’He glared at the Tiger. ‘Absolutely not acceptable.’
    ‘I don’t do anything like that,’ the Tiger said. ‘My kids are just studying them. Just having a look. Working out what makes them tick.’
    ‘As long as that’s all it is,’ the Jade Emperor said. ‘Supervise your scientists closely. Interfere with the demons’ true nature and Er Lang will land on you so hard you’ll think your nose is your tail.’
    Bai Hu saluted. ‘Celestial Majesty. I agree with you anyway.’
    ‘Jade and Gold,’ I said.
    ‘Ah.’ The Emperor leaned back. ‘Do you know why they are bound into servitude?’
    ‘No,’ I said. ‘They’re both obviously embarrassed about it, and I haven’t pushed the point.’
    ‘They deserved it,’ the Tiger said. ‘They should have spent the time in Hell.’
    ‘I didn’t see you charging out of the West to defend the honour of the Qing,’ the Emperor said.
    ‘You issued the goddamn edict telling us not to interfere yourself, Ah Ting,’ the Tiger said.
    The Jade Emperor thumped his hand on the table. ‘That is the third time you have called me that, Bai Hu. Call me Ah Ting again and I will have you executed! I gained this appointment through cultivation and merit and that story is a lie ! You are walking a very fine line!’
    The Tiger grinned and saluted.
    The Jade Emperor turned back to us, serene again. ‘In 1843, a young man by the name of Robert Fortune sneaked into China. He wanted to free our nation from the scourge of the opium trade. You know about that?’
    Both Simone and I nodded.
    The Jade Emperor continued. ‘The opium trade was purely because of the tea. Young Robert thought that if he could grow tea in a territory of the British Empire,then the traders would no longer need to sell the opium in China to pay for the tea.’
    ‘He stole the tea,’ I said. ‘There was a show on the History Channel a while ago.’
    ‘I saw that too, it was very good,’ the Jade Emperor said. ‘Anyway, he travelled the tea plantations looking for owners who would be patriotic enough to help end this