Free Things No One Will Tell Fat Girls by Jes Baker

hilarious), but you’d be surprised at the number of people who argue this simple concept. 4 For example, one comment on a Prince Ea video about haters and their anger made me giggle: “I post a few vulgar comments . . . and people auto assume I’m some unhappy asshole in real life. How about people stop being so goddamn sensitive?” 5
    Someone please give this guy a hug.
    This concept applies to our appearance as well: People who love their bodies don’t try to purposely make other people hate their own.
    Or as Meghan Tonjes puts it: “People who disrespect the bodies of others really don’t think that much of their own. I promise.” 6
    Unfortunately, it’s no wonder we see hostility online. Why? Because so many in our country (and beyond) spend their time tirelessly attempting to run toward an empty dream. Because body currency is a frustrating farce. Because all of those people have learned to hate their current bodies, and most have no idea that they can think differently. But the fact of the matter is, you can. Body love isn’t just for fat people, it’s for every person imaginable. Everyone has the right to self-love. Skinny people. Fat people. Short people. Tall people. All abilities. All sizes. All shapes. All shades. All sexes. All genders. Haters and lovers alike.
    After all, we’re all in this bullshit together. Throughout my “travels” online and IRL, I have yet to meet a woman who doesn’t have something she’d like to change about her body, and men are in a similar boat except they’re absolutely forbidden to talk about it. We’ve all been fed the same lies, and while that doesn’t give anyone the right to purposely hurt others, it does give us that crucial starting point for understanding.
    2. Institutionalized Sexism

    While “the race to thin” plays a huge and significant role in the negativity that is thrown toward body-lovin’ peeps, there are also other factors at play, one of those being sexism that is heavily institutionalized. Yes, ma’am. And while this will definitely garner a few eye rolls, some body hate has a lot to do with a favorite word of those scary feminists : patriarchy.
    That interview on This American Life continues:
    Lindy West: OK, so you found my writing. You found my writing, and you did not like it.
    Man: Certain aspects of it. . . . You used a lot of all caps. You’re just a very—you almost have no fear when you write. . . . You know, it’s like you stand on the desk and you say, I’m Lindy West, and this is what I believe in. Fuck you if you don’t agree with me. And even though you don’t say those words exactly, I’m like, who is this bitch who thinks she knows everything?
    Lindy then questioned whether the reason for these strong feelings might be because she’s a woman.
    Man: Oh, definitely. Definitely. Women are being more forthright in their writing. There isn’t a sense of timidity to when they speak or when they write. They’re saying it loud. And I think that—and I think, for me, as well, it’s threatening at first. 7
    This may have been a phone call with one man, but his opinions are ubiquitous. We hate watching women step out of line, speak up, and take up space. It instigates the fear Virgie talked about, which comes from not being able to control others, from not having the organized complacency that we need so desperately to feel safe. Paulo Freire said it best in one sentence: “Functionally, oppression is domesticating.” 8 Oppression certainly serves its purpose—it makes outspoken and confident women a threat to our comfortable system. Which means that outspoken and confident women who are also FAT? Well, they’re another rule-breaking satanic breed altogether.
    As women, we are disproportionately taught that our physical appearance is what makes us valuable, and that we must work toward becoming the perfect