Free Suited (St. Martin Family Saga) by Gina Watson

Isa cried through the tears.
    Cash pulled all the way out and pressed in again. Isa was weeping, and he couldn’t take it. He leaned forward and, sliding his hands around her back, he cradled her and pulled her up to straddle his legs. He pumped into her with moderate force and held her close to his chest. He whispered into her ear, “Isa, I love you. I want you to marry me.” Tears fell from his eyes, from hers, and rolled down their bodies and to the sheets. He needed to know that he could spend the rest of his life giving back everything she’d given to him. It would take him a lifetime. “Please marry me.”
    No other words were spoken. They made love long into the night and fell asleep entangled with one another.

9

     
     
    W hen she awoke, Isa remembered the words Cash had whispered into her ear. Marry me . Isa wanted nothing more than to marry Cash and have his baby, but she only wanted it if she knew he wouldn’t leave her again. Life would get harder, it always did, and where would she be if he abandoned not only her, but his child? There was no way to be certain that he’d stay this time and therefore, no way she could accept his proposal. Oh God! She didn’t know how to tell him no. Isa didn’t want to tell Cash she didn’t trust him to be her husband. He’d been hurt enough by his father and others who didn’t trust him. She felt sick just thinking about what she had to do, so she padded to the bathroom. Morning sickness had arrived.
    “Isa?”
    “Don’t come in here.”
    “Don’t be ridiculous.”
    Cash walked into the bathroom just as she vomited. She sagged down to the floor and leaned against the wall. Cash sat next to her on the floor and wiped her face with a cool cloth he grabbed from the sink.
    “Baby, are you sick?” He placed his hand to her forehead. “You don’t feel feverish.”
    “I think it was something I ate.”
    Cash frowned. “Do you want a bath?”
    “A bath sounds nice.” She smiled. A bath sounded like heaven.
    Cash ran the bath and scented the water with Isa’s perfume. She’d explained to him when they first met that her mother used to do that. The apartment-sized tub was too small to accommodate them both, so he helped her step in and kept her company while she bathed. She smiled at him, liking his attentiveness.
    He crossed his arms and smirked. “Like seeing me as your personal slave, do you?” She nodded. He flicked water toward her face. “So when are you going to marry me?”
    Her smile faded. Of course he’d want to talk about it now. She should have been prepared. “I think we should wait.”
    “Wait! What on earth are we waiting for?”
    “Cash, I can’t marry you.”
    Isa stood and reached for a towel. As she stepped out of the tub, Cash focused on the feather-light marks on her stomach that had once been home to their child. The marks were barely noticeable, but he saw. And his fingers reached out to trace them.
    “So we should wait and then you’ll marry me, or you won’t marry me period?”
    Isa took a deep breath. “I won’t marry you period.”
    Cash sat back on his heels. “Why?”
    “Don’t do this, don’t ask. I love you and I don’t want to hurt you, but I can’t marry you. Let’s just leave it at that.” She dried her body, then hung the towel on the back of the door. She walked to her closet and dressed in faded jeans and a soft white T-shirt. Cash was still on the floor in the bathroom.
    “I need some space.”
    “I get it, Isa.”
    Cash’s low raspy voice drifted on the air. He stood and walked to his clothes on the floor. His steps were slow, his movements jerky. “I wouldn’t marry me either. The things I’ve done to you… All I can do is apologize.” He pulled his shirt over his head. “If you ever need anything, even if it’s years from now, you know all you have to do is call.” He kissed her forehead, hugged her tight, then they broke apart.
    “Cash, can I give you a lift?”
    “No, I’ll manage.”