Free How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

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    “The same day, John saw us on the sidewalk while
    returning from a coffee break, and he shouted: ‘Hey
    Luke, hold up, I have some great news for you fellows.’
    He hurried over and very excitedly told us about an executive
    life insurance policy his company had introduced
    that very day. (It was the same policy that Carl
    had casually mentioned.) He wanted us to have one of
    the first issued. He gave us a few important facts about
    the coverage and ended saying, ‘The policy is so new,
    I’m going to have someone from the home office come
    out tomorrow and explain it. Now, in the meantime, let’s
    get the applications signed and on the way so he can
    have more information to work with.’ His enthusiasm
    aroused in us an eager want for this policy even though
    we still did not have details, When they were made
    available to us, they confirmed John’s initial understanding
    of the policy, and he not only sold each of us a policy,
    but later doubled our coverage.

    “Carl could have had those sales, but he made no effort
    to arouse in us any desire for the policies.”

    The world is full of people who are grabbing and self-seeking.
    So the rare individual who unselfishly tries to
    serve others has an enormous advantage. He has little
    competition. Owen D. Young, a noted lawyer and one of
    America’s great business leaders, once said: “People
    who can put themselves in the place of other people
    who can understand the workings of their minds, need
    never worry about what the future has in store for
    them.”

    If out of reading this book you get just one thing - an
    increased tendency to think always in terms of other
    people’s point of view, and see things from their angle
    - if you get that one thing out of this book, it may
    easily prove to be one of the building blocks of your
    career.

    Looking at the other person’s point of view and arousing
    in him an eager want for something is not to be
    construed as manipulating that person so that he will do
    something that is only for your benefit and his detriment.
    Each party should gain from the negotiation. In the letters
    to Mr. Vermylen, both the sender and the receiver
    of the correspondence gained by implementing what
    was suggested. Both the bank and Mrs. Anderson won
    by her letter in that the bank obtained a valuable employee
    and Mrs. Anderson a suitable job. And in the
    example of John’s sale of insurance to Mr. Lucas, both
    gained through this transaction.

    Another example in which everybody gains through
    this principle of arousing an eager want comes from Michael
    E. Whidden of Warwick, Rhode Island, who is a
    territory salesman for the Shell Oil Company. Mike
    wanted to become the Number One salesperson in his
    district, but one service station was holding him back. It
    was run by an older man who could not be motivated to
    clean up his station. It was in such poor shape that sales
    were declining significantly.

    This manager would not listen to any of Mike’s pleas
    to upgrade the station. After many exhortations and
    heart-to-heart talks - all of which had no impact - Mike
    decided to invite the manager to visit the newest Shell
    station in his territory.

    The manager was so impressed by the facilities at the
    new station that when Mike visited him the next time,
    his station was cleaned up and had recorded a sales increase.
    This enabled Mike to reach the Number One
    spot in his district. All his talking and discussion hadn’t
    helped, but by arousing an eager want in the manager,
    by showing him the modern station, he had accomplished
    his goal, and both the manager and Mike benefited.

    Most people go through college and learn to read Virgil
    and master the mysteries of calculus without ever
    discovering how their own minds function. For instance:
    I once gave a course in Effective Speaking for the young
    college graduates who were entering the employ of the
    Carrier Corporation, the large air-conditioner