Free Faith by Lesley Pearse

he’d seen my car go past his place well over half an hour before he saw Fenton’s car.’
    Stuart nodded. ‘That seemed to me to be the most damning piece of evidence against you. Could you have blacked out for a while or something?’
    ‘It was suggested, as I’m sure you know, that I might have blacked out all memory of killing Jackie,’ Laura said tartly. ‘But I can assure you I remember everything which led up to me going in that door and seeing her. Every detail, even the record that was playing on the radio! And I could hardly have fainted if I was still on my knees when Fenton came in. I think that McFee was either mistaken about the time gap, or he saw the real murderer, who may well have had a white car like mine too, but didn’t see me pass at all.’
    ‘He said he was painting an upstairs window.’ Stuart consulted his notebook again. ‘And that he had a clear view of the lane from his ladder. I drove out there to have a look round, and it’s a pretty remote spot. I only saw one car pass while I was there.’
    ‘It was different when Jackie was alive,’ Laura said defensively. ‘She had people turning up all the time. Why do you think that old codger watched so eagerly?’
    ‘Point taken.’ Stuart gave a knowing grin. ‘So how soon after the police arrived did they arrest you?’
    ‘A lot of that is blurry now,’ Laura said thoughtfully. ‘I remember I was in a state, hysterical really, and the first two policemen who came only asked me why I’d gone out there, who Jackie was to me and what she had said when she phoned me. I can remember sitting on a bench in the yard, and suddenly being aware there were dozens of police there, yet I can’t remember all the cars driving in.
    ‘It must have been late in the afternoon before they asked me to go with them to the police station. I was shivering by then; I was only wearing a thin jacket and the heat had gone out of the sun. I asked if I could go home to change first because I had blood all over me, and it was only when they said they’d need to take my clothes for forensic tests that I suddenly realized they thought I’d killed her. Then they cautioned me.’
    ‘How did you respond to that?’
    ‘I was livid. I couldn’t believe they could think such a thing. When they told me I’d need an advocate – you probably know that’s what they call solicitors up here? – I went mad, I said I didn’t need one as I hadn’t done anything.’
    ‘You flew into one of your rages?’ he inquired gently, his tone reminding her that he’d witnessed many of these in the past.
    ‘Yes, I’m afraid I did,’ she said glumly. ‘Well, wouldn’t you? She was my best friend, I’d known her since I was sixteen. I would never touch a hair on her head. I was in shock at what I’d seen. No one ever expects to walk in on something like that.’
    Stuart nodded. ‘You said at the trial you had forgiven her for Barney’s death. Was that true?’
    Laura closed her eyes in exasperation. ‘Of course I had. It was an accident. And eleven years had passed since his death, for goodness’ sake.’
    ‘Some things you don’t ever get over. The death of your child is probably the main one,’ he said and reached out to take her hands in his.
    It was his big, hard, brown hands holding hers that cracked the shell she had built around herself since being in this place. Stuart had loved Barney as if he were his own flesh and blood. She had watched those same practical hands washing him, dressing him and caressing him, and she owed it to him to tell him the truth about how she felt.
    ‘I still grieve for him, Stuart,’ she said brokenly. ‘I also feel a huge burden of guilt that I wasn’t a better mother to him. But I had come to terms with his death. As God is my witness, I didn’t hold a grudge against Jackie for it. She loved him too, I could see that it tore her apart thinking she was responsible because she hadn’t made him put his seat belt on. Yes, I had