Free It's Now or Never by Jill Steeples

time for a quick one,’ I said before I’d even considered whether it was a good idea or not. The only thing I knew was that I didn’t want him to go, not just yet; anything that prolonged our time together had to be a good thing.
    We walked away from the chapel together through the streets of Casterton and ten minutes later we were tucked away in a corner of a quaint tea shop in Market Square. I was full of nervous anticipation, relieved to be able to sit down and to have something to do with my hands, as I sat fiddling with the contents of the sugar bowl in front of me, but more relieved to be alone with Alex.
    â€˜There you go,’ he said, when he’d collected two cappuccinos from the counter and brought them over to our table.
    He also delivered two plates of cake, a vanilla slice and a coffee and walnut traybake which looked sinfully delicious and made me realise just how hungry I was. When he sat down he proceeded to cut both parts in two and pushed the plates into the centre of the table. He gestured with a slight incline of his head for me to get stuck in. A man who definitely knew the way to this woman’s heart.
    â€˜So how have you been?’ he said, picking up a piece of cake for himself and biting into it with gusto.
    â€˜Good, thank you. Busy.’ Our eyes met for a moment before we picked up our coffee cups in unison. ‘The wedding seems like a long time ago now. What a lovely day it was.’
    â€˜It was.’ There was a perceptible pause as his gaze roamed my face. ‘I texted you. Did you get my messages?’
    Not only had I received them, but I’d over-analysed them, obsessed over them, wondered if I should reply to them or if I shouldn’t just delete the whole lot. I couldn’t quite bring myself to do that. Instead I’d spent the last few weeks re-reading them, looking for any hidden intent behind his casual words.
    Hi, just wondered if you fancied getting together for that drink? Let me know.’
    â€˜How are you? Hope all’s well in the luxury goods world. Text me back when you have a mo.’
    â€˜Here’s a sad face :( That’s how I’m feeling right now. Thought you might want to get together some time, but I’m guessing not?’
    â€˜Am I being a pest? I don’t mean to be, but would be great to hear from you.’
    â€˜Was it my bad dad dancing that put you off? I could take lessons if that would make a difference.’
    â€˜Or maybe it was my conversational skills, did I really bore you to death that day, and you were just being polite? Or maybe it was my aftershave? Hmmm, I’ve been thinking I should change it for a while now. Or was it perhaps my dodgy dress sense?’
    â€˜Not all of those things, surely?’
    â€˜Okay, let it not be said that I can’t take a hint. You don’t want to see or hear from me. I get it. Don’t darken my doorstep ever again, kind of thing? It’s deeply depressing, but I get it. If you change your mind then you know where I am :) x’
    â€˜Yes, I did,’ I said, feeling embarrassed now. ‘I’m sorry I didn’t reply, it was just…’
    It was just what? I could hardly admit how humiliated I’d felt when he’d caught me loitering outside his gallery that morning. Every time I thought about it my cheeks stung with shame. I didn’t want him thinking I was needy or just sitting at home waiting for him to call. It was a one-night stand. There was no need for us to have anything to do with each other again. Angie had warned me what sort of a man he was. Just one night with him had left me feeling giddy, exposed and entertaining all sorts of fanciful thoughts. Any more and I knew I’d be in serious danger of getting in far deeper with Alex than would be good for my heart.
    No, I’d decided to try the same approach with Alex as I had with Marcia. Putting it out of my mind. Pretending it had never happened.