Free The Nothingness of Ben by Brad Boney Page A

here. Their friends are here.”
    “You’re not looking at the big picture. They have schools in New York, Ben. Better schools. And they’ll make new friends. Families move where the job is. That’s how the world works. If you’re going to be of any use to those boys, you need to be happy. What kind of role model are you going to be wasting away in Texas? You’re not going to be any kind of role model at all because you’ll be miserable.” Colin paused for a second. “And I already talked to my grandfather about the money issue.”
    “Tell me you didn’t do that. Please.”
    “He’s setting up a trust to cover a bigger place to live and private schools in the city. For all three of them.”
    “I can’t accept that.”
    Ben heard Colin sigh. Familiar.
    “Play the hand you’re dealt, Walsh. Life is painful right now, I understand that. But you’re not going to make the situation any better by clinging to your pride. You’re one of us now, and we take care of our own. I’ve told you a thousand times….”
    “I know.”
    “No one is batting an eyelash at the money except you. Promise me you’ll think about it. It’s the best option. And don’t assume your brothers won’t like the idea. Give them a chance, at least. New York can be an exciting place for a teenage boy.”
    “You should know.”
    “Exactly. I do know. What makes you think the same thing won’t happen to them that happened to you? You came alive when you moved here. Maybe they will too.”
    Ben smiled at the new possibility.
    “Okay, I’ll think about it.”
    “And you’ll talk to them?”
    “Yes, of course. I’ll talk to them today.”
    “Brilliant. So when do you plan on calling David?”
    “He’s on my list.”
    “You need to dance as fast as you can if you want to keep that door open. I am not saying it’s over, but he doesn’t understand why you’re not reaching out to him.”
    “I’m not a reacher.”
    “I tried to explain that to him.”
    “You two get your nails done together or something?”
    “He called me.”
    “I can always play the dead-parents card.”
    “Once. You can play that card once.”
    “I’ll call him.”
    A pause.
    “So how are you holding up?” Colin asked.
    “Honestly, it hasn’t hit me yet. I’m still waiting for my Steel Magnolias moment.”
    “What’s that?”
    “Never mind. There’s this guy across the street who’s been helping out. Travis. Straight guy, except….”
    “Is he hot?”
    “That’s always your first question, isn’t it? Yes, he’s hot. I thought something was going on, but turns out it was nothing. At least, he claims it was nothing. Still, it was weird. I mean, I thought we were just friends, but then last night at dinner he starts knocking up against my knee under the table.”
    “What does he look like?”
    “He’s a ginger.”
    “Have you seen him with his shirt off?”
    “Oddly enough, I have. I dropped by while he was having sex with his girlfriend. Except that she’s now his ex-girlfriend. As of last night. Anyway, he answered the door in nothing but a pair of blue jeans.”
    “Sexy. So what is this last night you keep referring to?”
    “Let’s drop it.”
    “Let’s not.”
    “Well, he goes downtown with his girlfriend last night and then shows up at the house an hour later. Tells me they broke up. Some things were said, and we got into this really uncomfortable argument about… I don’t even know what it was about.”
    “What does he do?”
    Ben cleared his throat.
    “He goes to school,” he lied.
    “A college boy?”
    “No, he’s our age. Grad student.”
    Ben felt bad, but he really didn’t want to think about it right now. Over the years, he had learned that there were some things Colin didn’t need to know. Telling the truth would only bring out a nasty ‘grease monkey’ comment.
    “Grad student, eh? So what happened after the argument? You didn’t cheat on your boyfriend, did you, Walsh?”
    “No. Nothing happened. He