Free The One I Was by Eliza Graham Page B

half was here at the airfield.
    The Spit was coming in to land now, the light still bouncing against its metal surface as though a giant torch shone on it. The wheels came closer and closer to the runway. Benny could make out Lady Dorner in the cockpit. He heard Lord Dorner’s intake of breath. They said landings and take-offs were the most dangerous times. Unless the Luftwaffe happened upon you while you were up there in the sky, as sometimes happened to auxiliary pilots, with no guns to defend themselves.
    The Spitfire was touching the runway now. Barely a bounce. Benny felt the warmth of relief, then a pang for Harriet Dorner. It must hurt, coming down to earth again.
    ‘Light as a fairy,’ Lord Dorner said. ‘Complete control.’ Pride oozed through his words. The plane came to a halt, resting so that its nose pointed skywards, keeping a lookout, Benny thought, in case it was needed again. The plane was smaller than he’d imagined it would be.
    ‘Come on, Benny, let’s go and congratulate her.’ Lord Dorner strode towards the Spitfire.
    Benny hung back. It felt like a private moment, as if Harriet Dorner had been showing off their newborn to her husband. She opened the cockpit and climbed down in what seemed like a few graceful movements. As she pulled off her helmet and gloves the sun seemed to turn its rays directly onto her, illuminating her. Her gold hair was tied in a bun against her neck. She wore a butter-coloured flying jacket over her uniform, which she undid. Her complexion was the unblemished honey gold he remembered. No freckles on Lady Dorner. The men’s clothes and her scraped-back hair made her look even more feminine. Lord Dorner held her in a quick embrace and kissed her. Benny felt his own lips tingle as the middle-aged man’s mouth brushed her lips. He knew what that sensation felt like now, thanks to Mona. But imagining his lips on Lady Dorner’s, instead of Mona’s, made him want to run away and hide. Lady Dorner was his guardian.
    In an attempt to suppress his confusion Benny moved towards the Spitfire, half expecting someone to shout a reprimand. The aroma of fuel and hot grease hung around the open cockpit, which was smaller than he’d imagined, almost perfectly designed for a woman of Lady Dorner’s build. The engine ticked as it cooled. Above the exhaust vents warm vapours shimmered. He looked over his shoulder, saw nobody was watching him, and touched the aluminium body reverentially before returning to the Dorners.
    Harriet was laughing, telling her husband all about it. ‘Sitting in the cockpit’s like wearing a Hardy Amies suit,’ she said. ‘And you only need the slightest touch and she’ll turn like a sparrowhawk.’ She noticed Benny. ‘Benny! How wonderful to see you. I’m glad you’re not ill too.’ She put a hand to the bun of hair and released it so that the gold locks swung forward.
    ‘I saw you land,’ he said, feeling like an inarticulate chump. Only this very morning, out in the woods with Mona, Benny had imagined this to be the most exciting day he’d had in years. How low his standards had been.
    ‘Wasn’t I lucky to fly that beauty? I just pray they let me do it again.’ She tucked one arm into her husband’s and the other into Benny’s. ‘But tell me what’s happening at home.’ Her gaze was on Benny now. ‘How are those poor boys?’ She was studying him. He was expecting her to say how much he’d grown, but she didn’t. The warmth of her arm in his was sending charges through his nervous system.
    Lord Dorner told her what the doctor had told them. She listened gravely. Benny hadn’t seen her look so solemn before.
    ‘I’ve got some leave coming up,’ she said. ‘I was going to carry it forward in case they gave me more … But I think I’m needed at home now.’
    ‘You need to rest, not nurse,’ her husband said.
    ‘I don’t like to think of the boys being ill with just Alice to look after them.’
    ‘You’re always saying how