Free Born This Way by Paul Vitagliano Page B

back, I knew I had those feelings as young as age five, but I didn’t realize it at the time.
    Because I was closeted until 1987, I had difficulty leading a so-called normal life. I was in hiding. Since coming out, I’ve found everything I need to live a happy life. Come out as soon as you can. I can’t think of any people I’ve known who’ve said their life got worse after coming out. The consequences are almost always better than people think they’ll be, and the negatives are much less. If you can’t fully come out, find other gay and lesbian people and socialize with them, and find other people you can trust with your truth. Being who you are and being happy with yourself—those are the most important things in life.

robert, age 13
    I have always been an avid record collector. In kindergarten, my teacher told my father that I liked to play with the girls and their dolls. My dad did not like that at all. So he taught me the “boy stuff,” like throwing a football. In junior high, the other boys did not want me on their teams, and I was called a sissy by most of them. My eighth-grade teacher even said to me, “Robert, are you a faggot?” The boys in my class called me “Rob-Butt” and I was bullied and ridiculed by the older, larger boys. So I kept to myself. Things got a little better in high school. By then, most of the bullies had failed their classes, but I graduated at seventeen. I came out to my parents when I was nineteen, and since then I have been out and proud, even while serving in the Marine Corps Reserve program. Life improves once we are open and honest about being gay.

maureen, age 9
    I’m here on the right with my BFF, Cheryl. We’re snuggled up together, and we used to hug and kiss every time we met. At our age in that era, people thought it was cute, but I really loved her. I asked my folks if we could adopt her, even though she had her own parents. In the 1950s, no one used the word
gay
yet, and I had no idea what a homosexual was. But I knew my love for Cheryl felt wonderful.

jerome, age 8
    We didn’t have the word
gay
when I was a child, only the word
sissy
. Thanks to my older sister’s 1950s movie magazines, I was obsessed with Hollywood glamour . In this photo, I’m emulating Marilyn Monroe, Jayne Mansfield, or Mamie Van Doren—perhaps all three! Growing up “special” in a tiny, rural Texas town wasn’t easy, but I survived. Through the years, I cringed whenever I came across this photo. But now, some fifty years after it was taken, I find it charming. Self-acceptance at last!

felix, age 5
    A couple years after this photo was taken, the birds-and-the-bees story circulated around the playground . My first reaction was to suggest to my best friend a position I demonstrated with my hands. I made two peace signs and connected them, also known as a “scissor sister.” And I said, “Well, couldn’t we just—?” Her reaction made it quite clear: “No. We cannot.”

frank, age 5
    My mother always said that I was a smiling and laughing child. Everywhere she took me, people would remark, “What a wonderful laughing baby.” She tells me that I soon learned that smiling—and sometimes posing—would open doors for me. In first grade, I held other boys’ hands and pretended to be married to them. I was forbidden to play with dolls, but I still managed to sew outfits for my sister’s Barbies. I hid my sewn creations in a bag and buried them in the yard so that I could bring them out to play whenever my parents left the house.
    In school, I endured beatings and humiliation. When the school bell rang at 3:00 in the afternoon to go home, I bolted out the door to avoid the bullies who waited to humiliate me in the hallways. As for the man I am today? I was born this way, and I am proud!

liz, age 6
    My mother had to bribe me to wear a dress, and I insisted on no puffed