Free Hit the Road, Manny: A Manny Files Novel by Christian Burch Page A

said good-bye to us and told Mom to watch her speedometer.
    “I will,” Mom promised, and Dad climbed into the driver’s seat.
    Officer Renny stood at the passenger-side window and said, “My favorite ABBA song is ‘Dancing Queen.’”
    Dad started the RV and changed the song to “Dancing Queen.” We pulled away as Officer Renny was dancing on the side of the road, trying to make Belly laugh through the window. Belly laughed and made the crazy sign by making circles next to her head with her finger.
    The manny looked over at me and said, “Nice going, ace! You almost got your mom jail time.” He laughed and messed up my hair, which I hadn’t brushed yet anyway. I like it when the manny calls me ace. I always call him joker.
    Dear Uncle Max (Sugar Bear),
     
    MOM GOT PULLED OVER BY A COP!!!!!!! There’s too much to write about it here. I’ll tell you later. We’re getting ready for bed in the RV. Lulu’s been in the bathroom forever. She says she’s moisturizing, but I think I just heard her light a match like Dad does to cover the bad smell.
     
    The manny wants me to send his hugs and kisses, even though Lulu says that things like that shouldn’t be written on postcards because the mailman reads them.
     
    Hi, Mailman. Thanks for delivering this.
     
    Love,
     
    Keats Rufus Dalinger
     
     

Math Addict 13
     
    After the police officer incident, Dad drove for a few more hours, while Mom stood in the little RV kitchen and made us turkey and cheddar sandwiches with tomatoes, lettuce, and mustard. She called it a “late lunch,” but it was more like dinner because it was four o’clock. The sandwiches were really good. Lulu said that it was the best one she’d ever tasted. Then she added that if Mom ever did go to jail for speeding, they’d probably make her wear a hairnet and work in the kitchen. Mom grabbed Lulu’s unopened snack bag of Fritos and crunched it in her hands as revenge for the jail comment. Lulu had to eat the chips directly from the bag like a drink. She said it’s the price you have to pay for having a quick wit. The manny agreed by nodding. He was paying the price for his quick wit by serving his punishment of silence from too many conduct marks.
    We stopped early that evening at an RV campsite that had big marked-off parking places, a fenced-in swimming pool, and a communal bathroom in the middle. There were RVs everywhere. Some were big and fancy and had striped awnings like porches. Some had clotheslines between them with drying sheets and swimsuits. One even had fake green grass around it like it was a yard, the kind of bright green plastic grass that is at miniature golf courses.
    We parked next to the green-and-blue-striped RV that had the fake yard around it. An older man in shorts and tall socks waved to us. He was hosing off his fake yard with a jet spray. His wife was grilling burgers on a small grill. She looked kind of like Grandma, except I never saw Grandma wear culottes or a tennis visor. Sitting in a folding chair next to her was a girl a little older than Belly wearing lavender corduroy overalls with a yellow T-shirt underneath. She was swinging her legs back and forth and had a serious look on her face like she was trying to figure out if her grandpa knew that the grass that he was watering was fake.
    The manny looked out the window and said, “They really should get a yard boy.”
    “Why is he watering it?” I asked.
    “DUH, SO IT WILL GROW,” Belly answered. Belly says “duh” sometimes. She learned it from Lulu.
    Dad laughed and brought the RV to a stop. Belly saw the little girl in her lavender overalls and decided she should probably change out of her pajamas. Mom says Belly is “fashion competitive” and doesn’t like it if somebody is dressed prettier than she is. Belly put on her Snow White dress that she bought at the Disney Store at the mall. She also put on her cowboy boots and her fake diamond tiara. Mom never should have let Belly pack her own