Free Keeping Your Cool…When Your Anger Is Hot!: Practical Steps to Temper Fiery Emotions by June Hunt

Irrational Thinking
    When people get angry, their problem-solving ability plummets. Consider the case of my normally even-keeled assistant, Elizabeth, who recently shared this story with those attending at our monthly Hope Biblical Counseling Institute.
    “Many years ago, I was driving to a corporate planning conference, where I was to serve as a presenter for the opening session. Hoping to arrive early, I instead became ensnarled in a terrible traffic jam. With each passing minute, I became more frantic.
    “My hands gripped the steering wheel…my jaw tightened…I could hardly take my eyes off the clock on the car dashboard. My heart raced as I scanned the horizon looking for a way—any way—to escape the gridlock. I began tailgating. Soon I was eyeing the median, wondering if I could somehow sail across it in the family minivan and find another route.”
    As her anxiety mounted, Elizabeth had no way of knowing that important chemical changes were also taking place inside her body. Here’s what happens when circumstances stress us:
    • Epinephrine (adrenaline) is released by the adrenal glands, 15 immediately preparing the body for a fight-or-flight response. However, if fight or flight does not occur, the highly energized body has difficulty calming down. (This is why angry people experience a racing heart, shaking hands, and fast breathing.)
    • The angry person’s hormones then travel from the brain to the adrenal glands, signaling the need for tension reduction by the release of cortisol. However, cortisol raises blood pressure above the norm, which makes rational thinking more difficult.

    Elizabeth continued her story:
    “As I sat there stewing, the thought crossed my mind that I had done everything but pray and give thanks to God in my situation. I realized the Bible says, ‘Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, wth thanksgiving, present your requests to God.’ 16 However, I was so anxious I could barely comprehend the thought. But still it persisted. So in a very sarcastic, very loud voice, I blurted out, ‘Okay, God, thank You ! Sitting in this traffic jam…being late for the big conference…is just great ! I mean I’m really thankful , God. In fact, if I were any more thankful, I just don’t know what I’d do!’
    “Just hearing myself be so irreverent, angry, and sarcastic with my wonderful, loving, patient heavenly Father jolted me. I felt convicted and saddened by my disprespectful attitude. After a minute or two, my heart began to soften and I began, again, to talk to God: ‘Lord, I’m sorry I have such a terrible attitude…that I’m so impatient and angry. I commit this drive and this day to You. Thank You for waking me up this morning…for giving me a car to drive and a job to drive it to. Thank You for taking such good care of me. Thank You that I’m not the one involved in the accident that’s slowing us down this morning. Please help those involved in the crash. I trust this drive to You and ask You to get me to the conference in Your perfect time. I love You, Lord! Amen.’
    “Unexplainable peace seemed to envelop every square inch of my car. It’s like I was driving a joy bubble. Instead of feeling anxious and angry, I felt calm and at perfect ease. I relaxed, sat back, and drove safely. I even begin to sing. The traffic began to open up, and I arrived at the meeting in time to start my presentation on time.”
    It’s as though Elizabeth took her bowl full of anger and tilted it outside the car window, its contents fluttering away in the wind—and in turn, she experienced a welcome return of her equilibrium. This should come as no suprise to us because after we do what the Bible says—sincerely pray about our problems with thanksgiving—then we receive what is desribed in the very next verse: “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” 17

5. Anger Undermines