Free My Ex From Hell (The Blooming Goddess Trilogy) by Tellulah Darling

said, thoughtful.
    Theo gave a cherubic grin. “A happy benefit.”
    “So you were using me.”
    “I saved you,” he retorted.
    I thought about this. “You did. But the price was being farmed out to Felicia and then being stuck in this crapshow for pretty much my entire life. If you were really watching over me, you would have pretended to be my nice dad. You wanted me to be your Joan of Arc puppet.”
    “I couldn’t be your dad. Things got … messed up. That’s why you didn’t meet me until grade two. Felicia’s utter lack of parental ability was perfect because she stashed you somewhere I could keep you safe. Besides, if this had happened the way it should have, you wouldn’t be whining.”
    “Yeah, well, would’a, could’a, should’a,” I snarked.
    We’d been crossing into one another’s personal space. A loud whistle pierced the air. Theo and I whipped around to find Hannah glaring at us.
    “Both of you, shut up!”
    That startled us. She’d never spoken to us in that tone of voice. The few other students across the room looked over.
    “The way I see it,” she said more quietly, “it’s humans who have been used. If I am going to believe this story, it sounds like we are the only innocent beings in all this. You Greek gods and goddesses are a bunch of narcissistic insensitives with unlimited power. Just a dandy combination.”
    “Don’t lump me in with them,” Theo sulked. “I’m a Titan.”
    “What? You’re not even a Greek god?” Oh this was just great.
    “Titans are better. We’re the deities who came first.”
    “Theo,” Hannah said urgently. She motioned to me. Both of them shot to their feet, grabbed my arms and hustled me out of the cafeteria.
    “Look down,” Theo hissed at me.
    I had no idea what was happening until he shoved me in front of my mirror, back in my room.
    “Sweet.” My normally blah brown hair had gotten darker. More lustrous. It had also gone from dead straight to falling in loose ringlets to my shoulders. “I’m like the after picture for a hair ad.” Massive delight.
    “That’s your real color,” Theo said. “Persephone’s real color.”
    “Well, it’s extreme makeover time because check out her eyes,” Hannah said. “They’re green. As in brilliant.”
    Theo looked at me a minute then came to stand beside me. “You’re taller too.”
    “A couple of inches,” Hannah agreed.
    I glanced down to see my ankles sticking out of my leggings like a total nerd.
    Hotter, taller me? My whoop of delight was probably heard in China.
    “And I get to live with this now. Thanks,” Hannah muttered at Theo.
    He gave her a grimace of apology.
    “Will my magnificence get cranked to eleven?”
    “Only if we’re truly blessed,” Theo grumbled. “You won’t reach your original height, but yeah, it’s all part of your true persona. Your natural abilities coming through.”
    “How big was my rack?” I asked hopefully.
    “Such tact,” Theo admonished. “I never noticed.”
    “How would big boobs help you save humankind? Unless you’re planning to poke out Hades’ eye with your diamond hard nips.” Hannah rolled her eyes at me.
    “Maybe that was my fiendish plan all along. I am goddess, see me poke.”
    I gnawed on my thumbnail. The thought that humankind’s existence was dependent on me was terrifying. Yes, I had some new memories and yes, I could do wonderful/awful things, but fundamentally, I didn’t feel any different. “It’s not like I suddenly feel this deep sense of purpose or destiny or anything.”
    “You will,” Theo assured me. “As more of your memories return.”
    “Am I going to have to face those … things again?”
    “Probably. ”
    “Things?” Hannah’s eyes lit up at the mention of new, potentially deadly creatures. She fell onto her bed, crossed her legs, and got comfy. “Do tell.”
    Theo flopped himself along the foot of her bed and clued her in. “The Pyrosim are courtesy of Hades.”
    “I called it an