Free Bend by Bailey Bradford

of the evening. No way did he trust himself not to spew out something that would piss Annabelle off. If she left in a huff because he fucked up, Evan was going to be upset, and Justin BEND
    Bailey Bradford
    50
     
    wouldn’t be happy either, but he really didn’t want to do anything that hurt Evan. He’d been hurt so badly last time, his emotions more invested in their former lover than Justin’s had been there at the end.
    The guilt Justin felt over Evan’s pain still ate at him. He’d known the relationship was failing, knew Mindy was using them and had suspected she was cheating on them. He’d been too wrapped up in trying to keep the ranch going, too exhausted from days that started at four a.m. and ended sixteen to eighteen hours later. His tunnel vision had hurt the one person he loved most, the only person who stood by him.
    “Can I speak to you for a minute?”
    Evan’s voice was laced with a hint of anxiety that pulled Justin back to the present. One glance at his lover’s expression and the barely cloaked irritation buried in it had Justin rising from his chair. Annabelle looked at him solemnly as they strode past her on their way into the kitchen.
    “What’s wrong?” Justin asked as soon as the door was closed behind them. “If you’re having second thoughts, we can tell her—”
    “Stop it!” Evan snapped. Justin stopped, stunned as he’d always been on the few occasions Evan had lost his temper over the years. “You’re doing it again! It’s not Annabelle, it’s you !”
    That accusation just hurt. “What do you mean, it’s me? I haven’t done anything! I’ve kept my mouth shut and let you take the lead—”
    Evan stepped close, glaring right up into Justin’s face. “No, you’ve withdrawn, just like you did the first time we brought Mindy over. It’s like you’re afraid to be yourself or something. And”—Evan took a breath while Justin tried to rein in his own temper, because, damn it, the truth did hurt—“you’re not letting me spend time with Annabelle, letting me get to know her. You’re making me do it because it’s easier than you having to try.” Evan stepped back and crossed his arms over his chest. There were no begging, puppy dog eyes now.
    Those brilliantly coloured orbs were shooting daggers straight at Justin’s heart.
    “You know what I think?” Evan didn’t give Justin a chance to answer. “I think you don’t want a woman in our relationship. Maybe you never did. Maybe you just knew how I felt and decided to humour me because, hey, it wasn’t like I’d be having sex with another man, so—”
    BEND
    Bailey Bradford
    51
     
    “Bullshit!” Justin snapped, his temper snapped, the tight binding holding back the hurt and fear that he’d kept bottled up spewed out Justin stalked Evan until the man was backed against the counter, his hands behind him to hold up his weight as he leaned away from Justin. “I’ve never lied to you! I never—God damn it!” Evan was right about some of those things, though. Justin’s anger drained away as he hung his head, grinding his teeth as he tried to figure out what to say. The truth would probably be best.
    “I won’t say at first I wasn’t a little leery,” Justin confessed, remembering the way his own needs met and clashed with Evan’s. He looked up and saw the fear in Evan’s eyes, the trembling of his lower lip. The ache he felt at putting that look there, causing the uncertainty in his lover, threatened to tear Justin up inside. He groaned as he cupped Evan’s cheek, wishing he had the words to tell the man how he felt, why he’d fucked things up when he’d only had the best of intentions. All he could do was stumble his way through it and hope Evan understood.
    “I felt—still feel the same way as you. I want what you want, and not just because you want it, but yeah. You gotta know I’d do anything for you, give you anything. Please don’t tell me that makes me a bad partner, baby,” Justin