Free Moving Mars by Greg Bear

see you.
    Intrigued, I was about to continue with my infernal questioningHow? What do you mean?when Charles stood up. But its useless. You havent liked me from the start.
    I gaped at him.
    You think Im awkward, Im not in the least like Sean, and that was who youd set your sights on And now I seem to be putting him down.
    Sean doesnt appeal to me, I said, eyes downcast in what I hoped was demure honesty. Certainly not after what he said.
    Im sorry, Charles said.
    Why are you always apologizing? Sit down, please.
    Neither of us had touched our mineral water.
    Charles sat. He lifted his glass. You know, this water has been sitting for a billion years, locked in limestone Old life. Thats what Id really like to be doing. Besides getting the physics grants and starting research, I mean. Going Up and exploring the old sea beds. Not talking politics. I need someone to come with me and keep me company. I thought maybe youd like to do that. Charles looked up, then rushed his proposal out breathlessly. Klein BM has an old vineyard about twenty kilometers from here. I could borrow a tractor, show you the
    A winery? I asked, startled.
    Failed. Converted to a water station. Not much more than a trench dome, but there are good fossil beds. Maybe the old discarded vintage has mellowed by now and we could try to gag it down.
    Are you asking? I felt a sudden warmth so immediate and unexpected that it brought moisture to my eyes. Charles, you surprise me. I surprised myself. Then, eyes downcast again, What are you expecting?
    You might like me better away from this place. I dont fit into Shinktown, and I dont know why I came here. Im glad I did, of course, because youre here, but
    An old winery. And going Up again?
    In proper pressure suits. Ive done it often enough. Im pretty safe to be with. He pointed his finger Up. Im no LitVid idol, Casseia. I cant sweep you off your feet.
    I pretended not to hear that. Ive never gone fossiling, I said. Its a lovely idea.
    Charles swallowed and quickly decided to press on. We could leave now. Spend a few days. Wouldnt cost much my BM isnt rich, but wed borrow equipment nobodys using now. No problem with the oxygen budget. We can bring hydrogen back for a net gain. I can call and tell the station to warm up for us.
    This was something slightly wicked and hugely unexpected and quite lovely. Charles would never pressure me to go one step farther than I wanted. It was perfect.
    Ill try not to bore you with physics, he said.
    I can take it, I said. What makes you think I was ever interested in Sean, romantically? ,
    Wisely, he didnt answer, and immediately set about making late-night preparations.
    Martians saw the surface of their world most often through the windows of a train. Perhaps nine or ten times in a life, a Martian would go Up and walk the surface in a pressure suitusually in crowds and under close supervision, tourists on their own planet.
    Call it fear, call it reason, most Martians preferred tunnels, and dubbed themselves rabbits, quite comfortably; red rabbits, to distinguish from the gray rabbits on Earths moon.
    I think I was more nervous sitting in the tractor beside Charles than I had been in my skinseal months earlier. I trusted Charles not to lose us in the ravines and ancient glacier tongues; he radiated self-confidence. What unnerved me was the proximity to emotions I had safely kept locked away behind philosophy.
    I will not explain my turnaround. I was becoming attracted to Charles, but the process was slow. As he drove, I sneaked looks at him and studied his lean features, his long, straight nose, slow-blinking eyes large and brown and observant, upper lip delicately sensuous, lower lip a trifle weak, chin prominent, neck corded and scrawnya heady mix of features I found attractive and features I wasnt sure I approved of. Unaesthetic, not perfection. Long fingers with square nails, broad bony shoulders, chest slightly sunken
    I knit my brows and turned my attention to the landscape. I