Free William Shakespeare's The Empire Striketh Back by Ian Doescher Page B

with care.
    There are but two or three things more, then will
    We make our swift departure hence. ’Tis fair?
    LEIA
    The swiftest shall be best. Some thing is still
    Awry. Where is C-3PO? He hath
    Not seen us or been seen for many hours,
    And no one knows about his way or path.
    Hath he lost all his faithful, droidly sense?
    Most happ’ly would I by him be annoy’d,
    If it did mean that he, at least, were near.
    HAN
    I shall inquire of Lando ’bout the droid.
    But in the meantime, Leia, have no fear.
    LEIA
    I trust not Lando.
    HAN
    —Neither, sweet, do I,
    Yet he’s my friend who helpeth us, dost see?
    I’ll warrant that we soon from here shall fly.
    LEIA
    Then thou shalt take thy flight as well—from me.
    HAN
    The future has its own time yet to write,
    And wheth’r or not we worry, my good lass,
    It comes as sure as day doth follow night.
    So, think not of it till it come to pass.
    [Exeunt Han Solo and Princess Leia.
    Enter a merry band of
U GNAUGHTS ,
singing as they pass around parts of C-3PO’s body.
    UGN. 1
    O pass me that!
    UGN. 2
    O give me this!
    UGN. 3
    We Ugnaughts are a’working!
    UGN. 2
    O pass the head!
    UGN. 3
    Give me the chest!
    UGN. 1
    Our duties never shirking!
    UGN. 3
    Thou naughty droid—
    UGN. 1
    Thou hast been caught!
    UGN. 2
    Thy prying never ceases!
    UGN. 1
    Your lesson learn’d—
    UGN. 2
    Our treasures earn’d—
    UGN. 3
    For now thou art in pieces!
    Enter
C HEWBACCA .
    CHEWBAC.
    Auugh!
    [Chewbacca begins collecting pieces of C-3PO.
    UGN. 2
    Take not the arms!
    UGN. 3
    Pray, leave the legs!
    UGN. 1
    Thy greed thou art revealing!
    UGN. 3
    But naught shall last!
    UGN. 1
    For nothing doth!
    UGN. 2
    Our treasures thou art stealing!
    UGN. 1
    So shall we speak—
    UGN. 2
    Our proverb true—
    UGN. 3
    With voices loudly ringing—
    UGN. 2
    It easy came—
    UGN. 3
    And easy goes—
    UGN. 1
    But still we keep on singing!
    [Exeunt Ugnaughts, singing.
    Enter
H AN S OLO
and
P RINCESS L EIA .
    LEIA
    I see, Chewbacca, thou hast found the droid,
    At least some small and varied parts of him.
    O, what hath happen’d?

    CHEWBAC.
    —Auugh!
    HAN
    —Thou hast found him
    Upon a junk pile, what? How can that be?
    C-3PO was fine when we arriv’d.
    But now, I fear, he is more dread than droid.
    LEIA
    ’Tis such a mess. Canst thou repair him, good
    Chewbacca?
    CHEWBAC.
    —Egh, auugh.
    HAN
    —Lando’s people can
    Provide the cure.
    LEIA
    —Nay, thank you: I’d not hav’t.
    Enter
L ANDO .
    LANDO
    Forgive me, worthy guests. Do I intrude?
    LEIA
    Nay, verily.
    LANDO
    —O, but thou art a beauty.
    I prithee, never leave—thou dost belong
    With us in our great city in the clouds.
    Thy loveliness doth put the sun to shame,
    Thy brightness of your cheek would shame the stars.
    LEIA
    [
aside:
] This scoundrel too familiar is. Now do
    I see that though I once thought Han uncouth,
    He is the sweetest smuggler ever liv’d.
    [
To Lando:
] Thou hast my thanks.
    LANDO
    —Now come, will ye join me
    For some repast?
    CHEWBAC.
    —Auugh.
    LANDO
    —Chewie, fear thou not!
    Be sure I meant that all invited are.
    [
Seeing C-3PO:
] Is there some matter with your droid?
    HAN
    —Nay, I
    Know not of any matter.
    [They walk, leaving C-3PO’s parts.
    Tell me, though,
    As we proceed to supper: art thou an
    Accepted member of the mining guild?
    LANDO
    Nay, we are none. Our operation is
    Still small enough that we may be discreet.
    ’Tis advantageous to our customers,
    For they are anxious to escape attention.
    LEIA
    [
aside:
] O, all this talk of bus’ness, mines and stealth!
    My mind cannot abide it, for I sense
    That terrible events shall soon befall.
    Within my mind a vision of some pain
    Begins to form, but still is indistinct.
    Would that I had some time to clear my thoughts!
    HAN
    [
to Lando:
] But art thou not afraid the Empire shall
    Find out about your operation and
    Then drive you out of business, or e’en worse?
    LANDO
    ’Tis e’er a danger that looms over us
    And all that we have built in Bespin’s