Free The Arithmetic of Life and Death by George Shaffner

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Two of a trade can never agree.”
     
— JOHN GAY
     
     
    S ince every company employee is on the same team, since there are so many futures at stake, and since there are so many barriers to be constantly overcome, it would seem that common cause would be common in business. It isn’t.
    A few years ago in Seattle, which is North America’s only urban rain forest, a team of loggers was called in to fell a huge cedar tree that prevented the construction of a new software laboratory. Shortly thereafter, a bulldozer was brought in to remove the stump, but the stump was so large and so deeply entrenched that the bulldozer could not budge it. The foreman in charge of tree extraction circled the stump, carefully considered the problem, checked his watch, then called in three more bulldozers.
    The new drivers, all of whom were independent contractors in competition with each other, individually surveyedthe stump and the terrain upon arrival. Then each of the four bulldozer operators threw a chain around the stump, started up his bulldozer, threw it into low gear and commenced pulling.
    On a hunch, the first bulldozer pulled toward the south. The second operator was convinced that he had a more powerful bulldozer than the first, so he pulled north. The third operator was certain that the stump was leaning toward the east, so he pulled in that direction. And the last operator was new to the profession and absolutely unwilling to work with any of the other three, so he pulled toward the west.
    In the finest American tradition, each desperately wanted to defeat the others and succeed in pulling up the stump. So each operator pulled hard and each pulled long. Since each bulldozer had a two-hundred-horsepower engine, a large quantity of energy was expended in the effort. But the stump remained unmoved.
    The foreman could see the problem. But he had started a small betting pool on the competition, and the loggers, big-shouldered men who did not like to be disappointed, had already placed their wagers. So rather than redirect the efforts of the bulldozers, the foreman doubled the quantity of gasoline and exhorted all four operators to try harder. Hours passed. Bulldozers strained against the load. Exhaust fumes filled the air. The foreman observed and exhorted. The loggers alternately cheered, booed, and did the wave. But still the stump was unmoved. Some time after darkness fell, they all reached a consensus to try again the following day.
    The next morning, the CEO of the software company returned from an important business conference on theisland of Bora Bora. Being a man in a hurry, he immediately increased the gasoline budget by a factor of five, he fired the operator with the most flagrant tattoos, he offered large bonuses to the three remaining operators if they succeeded in removing the stump by ten A.M., and he threatened to terminate everyone if the stump was not vanquished by lunchtime.
    Leaving the foreman shaken but in control, the CEO sped off to an early tee time with an investment banker. He returned at noon to find the bulldozers inactive, the operators at lunch, the loggers on strike, the foreman in a deep depression, and the stump resolutely in place. Furious, the CEO fired the remaining operators and called in a professional negotiator to buy off the loggers. Then he hired a demolition expert to deal with the stump, he ordered the foreman to closely observe the execution of the new plan, and he hired an Ivy League consultant to explain the delay to the board of directors.
    Fearing the fate of the foreman, the demolition expert used a large quantity of explosives. The stump, and its immediate environs, were vaporized.
    After several months of careful study and a number of field tests, the consultant was able to conclude that only 250 horsepower would have been needed to extract the stump. A single bulldozer, which used an estimated 50 horsepower to impel itself through the mud, would have been able to