Free Surrender: Guilty Pleasures #1 (BBW Erotic Romance) by Adriana Hunter Page A

intense if I’d have said ‘pineapple’ and you’d have
just made love to me.”
    Jake looked down at me. “Do you
think that’s submissive behavior, Abby?”
    I frowned. “Well, no…
    His voice was soft, questioning.
“I’m not criticizing you here. I want you to think…about your actions and
reactions…and how you think that fits into this relationship, about your role
as a submissive. Were you submissive today?”
    My frown deepened. “No, I wasn’t.
I wanted to be, at first at least. I wanted you to control everything, to give
myself over to you. But when it got, well, frustrating, I got mad at you.”
    Jake smiled. “I sensed that,” he
said wryly. “It was pretty clear you were frustrated. But did you ever stop
trusting me, trust that I was going to somehow make things better, give you
something in return? Something beyond what you could have had in other
context?”
    “Maybe I did. Maybe that was the
tipping point: I stopped trusting that you would take care of me. I thought you
were just being mean.”
    Jake made a non-committal noise
in his throat. It was a long time before he spoke, as if weighing his words
carefully.
     “You’re not ‘winning’
anything; it’s not a contest. You’re submitting willingly and taking pleasure
in the outcome…and in being a good submissive.” He hesitated, looking up at me.
There was pain in his eyes. “I’m not trying to be cruel, Abby. I hope you know
that.”
    I reached out, touching the back
of his hand. “I know…I know that now. But then…” I waved my hand. “I wasn’t
really thinking then. I was going off pure emotion, or past experiences.” I
made a face.
    “I made a mistake today. My goal
in this session was to withhold your orgasm until I wanted you to come, until I
gave you permission, not until you won it from me. There’s a difference; I’m
not dominating you if you feel you’ve gotten one over on me. There’s no power
shift if you feel you won. And I’m sorry I wasn’t clearer in my expectations
today. It won’t happen again.”
    His gazed fell on my hands, still
clutching the edges of the blanket. He took them both in his, running his
fingers slowly over the angry red marks.
    “We should wash these off. You
can put ice on them later; it will help with the pain.”
    I sat up suddenly, a flash of
memory coming back, of Jake’s shoulder against my mouth, the taste of blood on
my tongue.
    “Oh! But I bit you.” I looked at
his shoulder, a tiny drop of dry blood visible. My hand flew to my mouth.
    “I didn’t remember…I’m sorry.” I
reached out to touch him, but stopped, my fingers held above his skin. Was this
aftercare or just caring? I pulled back in confusion.
    He glanced down at his shoulder,
frowning, then looking up to meet my gaze. A smile played around the corners of
his mouth.
    “And good submissives don’t
bite.”
    He slid off the bed and left the
room. I could hear water running and then he returned with a damp washcloth and
towels. He took my hands, lightly pressing the cool wet cloth against my hot
wrists, dabbing gently.
    Silently he handed me the cloth
and I sat up, the blanket slipping from my shoulders. I dabbed at the marks,
wincing inside. I really did that?
    Jake offered me a shower and
food, but I refused. I wanted to be home, in my own bathtub, eating my own
food. We dressed separately and he walked me down the stairs to my car, holding
to door as we stepped outside. I blinked, expecting the bright sunshine of
mid-afternoon. But I’d walked into the soft light of early evening.
    I spun around. “What time is it?”
Neither of us was wearing a watch and it dawned on me there had been no clock
in the tower room.
    “I really don’t know, Abby. I
wasn’t paying attention.” He was looking down at me, a slight smile playing
around the corners of his lips.
    “I told you sessions can
sometimes run long or that we’ll lose track of time. It’s why I want true
sessions here…” he gestured up