Free Dear Playboy Advisor: Questions From Men and Women to the Advice Column of Playboy Magazine by Chip Rowe Page B

erotic desires.” To prevent sexual intrusions, the authors recommend an anti-erotic vegetarian diet rich in vitamins and salts. “Whole wheat bread, potatoes, vegetables, salads, fruit, etc., also prevent constipation,” they noted, while “stimulating foods” such as game, fish, eggs, cheese, mushrooms and alcohol only cause trouble. Whatever your diet, you’re more likely to have pleasant dreams when you’re relaxed. Anxiety can produce landscapes you may not want to visit: running into your mother at an orgy, discovering strange plants growing from your genitals or realizing at a crucial moment that you left your penis in your other pants—but that your girlfriend brought hers.
     
    Sexy recipes
    I would love to have some sexy recipes to impress my girlfriend. Any suggestions?—L.W., Phoenix, Arizona
    We recently came across a tantalizing work in progress, Simple Recipes That Will Help Get You Laid , by a photographer who goes by the online nickname Short2000 (short2000.com/simple). She uses color, fruit and scotch to get the job done. Examples: (1) Place fresh pineapple chunks and maraschinos on skewers, then throw them on the grill for a few minutes until the pineapples are slightly caramelized. For extra impact, serve with coconut ice cream. (2) Blend two cups of frozen mango chunks, or two large, soft but not mushy mangoes, with a cup of yogurt and a cup of vanilla rice milk until thick and smooth. Serve in a frosted wine glass, and top with fruit. (3) Mix salad greens, pomegranate seeds and balsamic vinaigrette for a “sweet, crunchy, juicy, tangy, leafy” salad. (4) Pour single malt scotch into a colored glass and call it a butterfly wing. “The name alone will get you some action, and its color will cast spells. Just don’t use a glass that says SeaWorld or anything like that.” If any of this gets you laid, drop Short2000 a line to thank her.
     
    Serving caviar
    What is the best way to serve caviar?—D.S., Cleveland, Ohio
    Place the open container in a small glass or porcelain bowl, surrounded by crushed ice. Don’t use a metal or stainless steel serving spoon, which can spoil the taste. Some caviar lovers insist the roe should be served only with lightly toasted bread points, or with a squirt of lemon juice if you’re serving a lesser-quality grade. You don’t want to serve chopped eggs, onion, sour cream, crème fraiche or anything that overpowers the roe. The drinks of choice are dry champagne or frozen vodka. Adventurous hosts use caviar to top dishes such as omelettes, pasta, salads or fish. In preparing caviar, never freeze or cook the eggs, and finish eating the roe within a week of opening the tin. Store fresh caviar in the coldest part of the refrigerator, or in a bowl of crushed ice; unopened tins will remain fresh a few weeks at best. Traditionally, the best roe (beluga, oestra and Sevruga) comes from the Caspian Sea, but because of concerns about overfishing, the U.N. has banned the international trade of wild sturgeon caviar. Fortunately, some American caviar is also excellent.
     
    How to sharpen a blade
    My set of cooking knives includes a metal rod with a wooden handle. I assume this is to sharpen the blades, but I have no idea how to use it. How do you hold it?—K.L., Atlanta, Georgia
    The steel isn’t designed to sharpen a dull blade; instead it maintains the edge of an already sharp knife. A chef or butcher will use the steel every few minutes; for cooking at home, it’s sufficient to steel after each use. Many people simply flail the steel and edge together, but craftsman Keith De’Grau, who runs HandAmerican.com, a site devoted to cutting tools, says control is the key. “My preference is to hold the steel vertically and then tip it 10 to 20 degrees one way or the other, depending on the angle of the edge,” he says. “Run the blade straight down the steel, from bolster to tip, drawing it toward you. Repeat for each side.” (His site has photos.) Regardless of your