Free A Film Star, A Baby, And A Proposal by CC MacKenzie Page A

he touched her she'd totally lose it.
    All she wanted to do was to throw herself into his arms and just let all her pent-up feelings out. But she knew that once she started crying she'd never stop. And he'd be too kind and understanding and gentle. And that would kill her.
    Oh G od, this was a nightmare.
    " It's okay. It's me. Pregnancy hormones. Do you think we can get out of here? Go for a walk or something?"
    "S ure." He pulled her to her feet, held her wrists. His thumbs rubbed the racing pulse points on her skin as blue eyes searched hers. Eve recognised anxiety and guilt and something else she couldn't identify.
    " We'll go for a walk in the snow and I promise I won't lay a finger on you. Unless you want me to."
    That was the trouble, Eve thought.
    She did want him to.
    Half an hour later they were kitted out in thick socks tucked inside wellington boots and duck down puffa coats all purchased from the shop at Ludlow Hall.
    The snow had stoppe d, but a glowering sky the colour of heavy pewter hung above them. And that sky absolutely suited Eve's mood. She couldn't think straight when she was near him. Right from the beginning he'd affected her like this. It was as if her body and her mind were two separate entities. What she needed to do Eve decided was to keep her focus purely on the child she carried.
    G usts of icy wind nipped at her cheeks, brought a tear to the eye.
    They strolled across the vast lawn of pristine snow towards the river.
    Eve pressed her mouth into her muffler and shoved gloved hands deep into her coat pockets.
    Turning to walk backwards to study her face, Matt grinned.
    " You look cute," he told her.
    She wore a sheepskin aviator hat the colour of clear honey. It had cost a fortune in the Ludlow Hall shop, but he'd plonked it on her head and insisted she wear it. The wind swirled powdery snow around them and she had to admit the hat had been one of his better ideas.
    Taking a deep inhale , the freezing air stung icy needles in her throat, her lungs, but she didn't care.
    She felt so much better outdoors walking through the white field, breathing fresh air.
    The river was swollen, fast running and they strolled alongside the bank, each lost in their own thoughts.
    " When did you find out?" he asked now.
    "S ix weeks ago. I've never been pregnant before so I was a little bit slow on the uptake and went to the doctor thinking I had a virus."
    Now he tucked his chin into his muffler, the woollen beanie was pulled low on his head, all she could see were blue eyes narrowed against the wind and his nose.
    He shook his head. "I'm sorry I let you down."
    She heard genuine regret and her stupid heart couldn't help but respond. "I know you don't want this..."
    He kept his eyes on hers as he took her gloved hand. "Do you want this? Did you ever think..." He stopped dead and again shook his head. "I'm sorry, I don't mean..."
    He might not be able to say it, but Eve knew exactly what he meant.
    " You mean have an abortion?" The word made him flinch but she kept her eyes on his. Temper burned too bright in her heart, in her belly. So this was what the little walk in the snow was all about? To quiz her why she hadn't killed her child? she thought, completely forgetting that the walk in the snow had been her idea in the first place. "Never."
    Then she swung around to trudge back to Ludlow Hall.
    Matt grabbed her upper arm and turned her round to face him blue eyes sparking with outrage.
    " I didn't mean..."
    Her eyes searched his .
    She read dismay and regret and that regret had her temper spike.
    " Yes you did. I'm a single woman with my whole life ahead of me. I've a stellar career so it would make sense for me to decide not to keep a baby. Right? And no one would ever know. Right?" Now her voice rose and his face went too pale. "Hell, in your world it probably happens every day, doesn't it? It's a logical question and you have every right to ask it. But I couldn't even consider it."
    " Will you please stop