Free Life in a Rut, Love not Included (Love Not Included series Book 1) by J.D. Hollyfield

ponder this idea while I attempt to get a bit more comfortable against the ledge, debating how well I can adjust my hand movements while hanging halfway off a window ledge. Then, just as I start making the simple attempt of skimming my fingers down my belly, Jack stops. He lifts his shirt just over his navel to wipe off the sweat above his lip, revealing—
    “ Oh mother of abs! ”
    SPLAT!
    And . . . man down.
    If a 125 pound, semi-intoxicated, totally turned-on human could have made a bigger commotion while slipping off the dresser and taking a face tumble five feet to the ground, I would be impressed. I even manage to knock over my box tower all while kicking the lamp into the window, causing it to shatter, and of course, I end my fall by splitting my pants straight down the rear on the way down.
    Such is the life of Sarah Sullivan. May we take a short commercial break while I ponder 101 ways to disappear?
    I hear people scurrying around downstairs, most likely to come to my aid. Maybe if I just keep my eyes closed they will assume that I am sleeping. People sleep in odd positions, so why would this be any different?
    “Sarah, oh my, what happened!?” My mother rushes to my side. Followed by Aunt Raines, dear old Dad, and I believe, Jack. At this time I refuse to open my eyes.
    “I think she knocked herself out,” I hear my father say, while Aunt Raines chimes in.
    “Poor baby girl, did you split your pants?” Remind myself to kill her while managing to take myself out, too.
    “Honey, say something. Are you OK?”
    I am not sure how much longer I can play dead for, but I plan on giving it a try. I can feel all the shadows hanging over me. They should get bored of the scene soon enough and move on with their day.
    See? In no time, I can sense them moving and the light peering over my closed eyelids. Finally . . . Oomph. What the hell? “What the hell?” My eyes fly open to witness Jack . . . scooping me up in his arms!
    “Honey.” My mother’s voice again. “What were you doing in here that you knocked over all those boxes and broke your lamp shade?”
    Just then I witness all their minds spinning in unison, along with Jack’s, and it seems they all put two and two together at once. Slowly Jack turns to me, still in his arms, grinning.
    “Did something catch your eye, Sarah?”
    Oh god, did it.
    “No,” I say, not at all convincingly.
    Jack carries me to the bed and gently lays me down, his fingerprints burning into my sides. I can see my mother looking out the window. “Honey, what were you looking at?” Oh god, just kill me!
    “Nothing, I’m fine! Everyone get out!” Two more seconds with him this close to me and everyone in the room is going to get more than what they bargained for. Jack included.
    “Well I hope you are OK, dear. Looks like you took quite a tumble.”
    Still holding me, Jack leans in. Feeling his breath on my neck, I hear him say, “Are you sure you’re OK?”
    I try swatting his hands away from me. “I’m fine,” I say quite breathlessly.
    As he lets me go and adjusts himself upward, everyone else takes that as a cue to begin their exit. Jack gives me a wink as he turns to exit my room.
    “Honey, well at least since your pants are ruined you may want to wear something more . . . yourself?” My mother smiles at me and walks out. Avoiding it until now, I look down and see that my comfort zone pants are ruined. Split wide open and revealing a nice pair of purple underwear. Well, at least there’s that.
    I decide to lay low for the rest of the evening. Not that I am hiding from anything, or anyone, in particular. I decide it is safer for everyone as well as for my own self-esteem to stay in my room for the rest of the night.
    After waking up to pounding and sawing the next day, I begin to sort through boxes and lay some folded clothes in the dresser. Once I was done making some room, I was going to have a burial for my comfort zone sweats. I grab the piece of paper sticking