Free The White Garden by Carmel Bird

face, neck, arms and hands. One cheek was grazed by the brush with the locker. The sister dabbed the graze with antiseptic. Therese opened her eyes as the antiseptic stung her face. The sister pulled her nightgown on over her underwear, tucked in the bedclothes, took her pulse and temperature. Normal. Thank goodness for that. She tidied away the soap and cloth and left Therese to sleep off her fatigue after the Amytal and Ritalin. She put the injury on record: ‘Patient grazed side of face when getting into bed. Cleaned graze with Dettol.’
    One of the other women in the Sunroom sat up in bed and took her sewing from her locker. It was her task from OT
    — a red, white and blue cloth octopus. She didn’t use a needle, these being banned from the Sunroom, but she set about stuff ing the toy with crumpled bits of nylon stocking. As she stuffed the octopus she nodded at Therese and said in a loud voice:
    ‘War Casualty. Extensive Facial Injuries. Internal Bleeding.
    Coma.’
    And one of the other women said in a low, tired voice: ‘Shut up, Florence Nightingale, and get on with your octopus.’
    A woman who appeared to be asleep, and who didn’t stir or open her eyes, said in the tone of a school mistress’s authority:
    ‘Quiet now, girls. No talking in the back row. Listen carefully and take notes.’
    ‘Silly old bitch,’ the second woman said.
    Then all was silent again and the room was filled with the bright sunlight of the afternoon which cast the shadows of the bars across the beds.

    Saint Ditto of Lisieux
    49
    It was a curious fact that nobody ever listened to the silent tape that Therese made when she lay in the cubicle. The tape had her name on it, and the next time she came up for Amytal and Ritalin it was used again. Her eyes went black after the fall, and Dr Goddard said: ‘Been in a punch up with the nurses?’ His voice was joking, but his eyes were cold. ‘No point in that, milady. The nurses here are all trained thugs. Kill you as soon as look at you.
    I wouldn’t ever get on the wrong side of them myself. You just watch your p’s and q’s and do as you would be done by. How do we feel after our first go at the truth drug? Clears the mind, doesn’t it? Hasn’t done much for your appearance, I must say.
    But you’ll mend.’ He laughed loudly and moved on. Therese made no attempt to answer him. It was three days before she saw him again, and he was only a blurred recollection, less defined than the images of her dreams and imaginings.
    During those weeks Therese’s mother visited her, bringing flowers, fruit, biscuits, chocolate, nightdresses. ‘You must have something to eat, Therese. You’ll never get better if you don’t eat.’ She took the washing away and came back each time with clean clothes. ‘Sister says you’re not eating, and not talking to anybody. But why is that? If you start to cooperate they’ll let you have visitors. The others are dying to come and see you.
    They send their love. Mrs Darcy made you some rock cakes.
    Margaret’s been promoted, put in charge of the whole primary school. And Louise has nearly finished the dress she’s making.
    I have to go to Myers for the buttons. Frankie’s going to have her hair permed she says, and Rosie and the children came over last night and they were so funny. Try and eat your meals, duck, and brighten yourself up a bit.’ The voice tailed off. Therese lay silent and unresponsive in the bed. Her mother stared in desperation and anguish at the other women in the Sunroom.
    She patted and smoothed the cover on Therese’s bed and looked kindly and earnestly into Therese’s face. But her daughter’s eyes were blank and her mouth was closed. Then suddenly Therese gripped her mother’s hand and a violent light came into her eyes. ‘Take me home,’ she said. ‘I want to go home.’ But her mother shook her head in a bewildered little gesture and said,
    ‘No, duck, the doctor says you’ve got a long way to go before 50
    The