Free Forever and Always by E. L. Todd

one priority, even over you. Believe me, I don’t
want to lose you, and this arrangement is killing me. I don’t want
this, Scar. I really don’t. I don’t want Penelope. Please tell me
you understand—I need to hear you say that.”
    I started to cry. “She is
just going to fuck you over again, Sean. When she finds someone
better that doesn’t care that she already has a kid, she is going
to leave you. Don’t you get that? You are just going to end up
divorced and alone. And I’m not going to be there when she breaks
your heart again, Sean.” I wiped my tears away and ran my hands
through my hair. “I want nothing to do with you, Sean. You are
picking her over me and you are making the wrong choice, Sean.
The wrong choice.”
    “ I’m not picking her over
you!” he said. “I’m stuck with her. She is pregnant with my kid.”
    “ I already heard you say
that,” I snapped. “And you can still be a great father without
fucking the mom. Fuck you, Sean. You are going back to her because
you want her. You’ve never gotten over her. This pregnancy just
gives you an excuse.”
    “ Please don’t say that,
Scar. You know that isn’t true. You know how much I love you. I
want to be with you. I mean it.”
    “ Get the fuck out of my
apartment and go back to where you came from,” I said. “I never
want to see you again—ever. I mean it. Don’t call me or come back
to Seattle. And don’t you dare call my brother. After I tell him
what you did, he is going to fucking kill you, Sean. We are
done—for good. I hope you have a good life with your family. Now
go.” I turned around and let my tears fall without letting Sean see
them. He didn’t move for the door, but I waited for him to take his
leave. I felt him stand behind me and touch my arm
lightly.
    “ Please tell me that you
understand,” he whispered. “I need to hear you say that. I
understand that you are angry—I am, too—but please tell me you
understand.”
    “ Don’t touch me,” I said
as I jerked my arm away. “Now get the fuck out of my
apartment.”
    He didn’t move. I turned around and
shoved him as hard as I could. Sean fell to the ground, but didn’t
retaliate. He rose to his feet and looked at me with tears dripping
from his eyes.
    “ Have a good life, Sean.
Go be with your real family.”
    Sean grabbed his bag and placed it
over his shoulder. “I love you, Scar.”
    “ Don’t ever call me that
again.”
    “ I love you,” he said. “I
know you believe me.” He turned around and left the apartment,
closing the door gently behind him. When I heard the door shut, I
collapsed on the ground and heaved with the heavy sobs that shook
my body. My body convulsed with pain, and for the first time, I
didn’t want to go on—I didn’t want to live. Sean made me so happy
and now he betrayed me. Broke my heart into so many pieces, it
looked like fairy dust. Hours went by as I laid in the living room,
crying to myself. I remembered how depressed I was when I first got
to Seattle and how much it hurt my brother. I didn’t want to do
that again. I’d made so much progress and I didn’t want to falter
again—I didn’t want to fall.
    My body lifted itself up and I stood
in the middle of the apartment. The mirror on the wall showed my
reflection of smeared makeup and running mascara. My hands wiped
away the evidence of my tears, and I took a deep breath. I couldn’t
let myself fall again. Sean had betrayed me once, and it was my
fault that I let him hurt me again. My life wouldn’t spiral out of
control like last time—I wouldn’t let that happen.
    My heart throbbed painfully for the
trauma I’d just experienced, but I swallowed back the pain and
decided that it wasn’t worth it. Sean wasn’t worth the pain even
though we were perfect together and it felt so right. He was an
idiot for throwing me away for a cheating bitch—even if she was
carrying his baby. Sean and I were over. We were done. No amount of
crying would change