Free Superstar in a Housedress: The Life and Legend of Jackie Curtis by Craig B. Highberger Page A

knows what a girl like … you … wants from a man in his position. You know perfectly well what this could do to him socially and politically. If not for my sake, then for his …
    I beseech you, Miss Noonan.
    NOLA
    Oh, a beseecher! One of those!
    (SHE hooks the sleeve of THE WIFE’S DRESS with her finger.)
    Lane Bryant?
    THE WIFE is insulted and pulls angrily away.
    NOLA
    All right, all right … let’s not have a scene here. These furnished dressing rooms are very touchy, you know. So what is it? You want him back? Well, he’s yours. No strings attached, no sneaky deals, nothing. Just get him off my back, huh?
    The WIFE bursts into noisy tears, blowing her nose into a hanky.
    NOLA (CONT’D)
    Hey, what’re you crying for? I figures it this way. If you was any kind of a good wife to begin with — and you know what I mean by ‘a good wife’ — none of this “I got a headache tonight” shit. He would never have stepped out on you for me in the first place. If you know what I mean!
    The WIFE slaps NOLA, but quickly regains her composure.
    WIFE
    I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.
    NOLA
    Why be sorry? I was outta rouge. You done me a favor, got a little color in my cheeks.
    Well, like you say: “One good favor deserves another favor,” and I’m gonna do you the favor of cuttin’ this little drama short, so tell me something, Mrs. Freedman … are you through?
    WIFE
    Why, you’re just cheap, tawdry and vulgar!
    NOLA
    Yeah? What else did he say about me?
    WIFE
    You haven’t got a streak of decency in you.
    NOLA
    Listen, bitch, I don’t go around showin’ my good points to strangers. Now, I’ll kindly trouble you to get the hell out of here!
    NOLA shoves the WIFE out the door, and then returns to the mirror. GERALD FREEDMAN enters. HE is a milk man, and carries bottles of milk with him in a wire container.
    JERRY
    Nola! Nola! Nola, baby!
    NOLA
    Did anybody see you come here?
    JERRY
    No.
    NOLA
    Good. Then no one will see you leave. Get out.
    JERRY
    Nola, what is it?
    NOLA
    We are through, done with, finished, all over with, Mr. Freedman. Is goodbye one word or two?
    JERRY picks up a document from the top of the trunk.
    JERRY
    Nola, what is this?
    NOLA
    It’s a timetable … railroad’s put ’em out. Listen, squirt, go peddle your cow juice somewhere else. I’m fed up with you … you’re never gonna get me anywhere. That wife of yours was just here, and she begged for you back.
    JERRY
    But Nola, I can’t live without you.
    NOLA
    (SHE takes a container of milk and puts it on her vanity table.)
    A man in your position, you’ll manage, sweetie. Listen, hurry up and say what you gotta say … y’know, I got a show to do. There are people waiting for me, hundreds and thousands of people.
    JERRY
    Nola, where did I go wrong?
    NOLA
    Don’t get personal. I hate probes.
    JERRY
    Y’know, you’re just cheap, tawdry and vulgar.
    NOLA
    Don’t you ever say that again!
    JERRY
    Why?
    NOLA
    Because you just said it, and a thing like that gets around!
    There is a loud knocking on the door. We hear an offstage VOICE.
    VOICE
    Three minutes, Noonan!
    NOLA
    Yeah, yeah, I’m coming. Well, Jerry, do you understand English, or do I gotta draw you a picture of how a girl makes the rent? Now blow!
    VOICE
    C’mon, Noonan, you in there?
    JERRY takes a wad of bills out of his pocket and throws it all in NOLA’s face.
    NOLA
    What’re you doing?
    JERRY
    Trying not to bore you. This is what you want, isn’t it?
    NOLA
    Get out! Get out! You know I’m not mercenary by nature.
    HE has left. The door slams and NOLA runs to it. SHE kneels down to stuff the bills carelessly in her bra. The knock on the door grows more insistent.
    VOICE
    Hey, Noonan, get out there, they’re playing your music! Noonan, let’s get movin’. Get those tits on that stage, Noonan!
    NOLA
    Nola Noonan never misses a cue!
    BLACKOUT.
    (END of excerpt.)
    Craig Highberger
    Jackie received excellent reviews for Glamour, Glory and Gold when it opened in 1967 at