Free Hold On by Hilary Wynne

doesn’t really
     believe me. All he says is, “Let’s go back to sleep.”
    I whisper, “Okay.” I don’t want to get into a discussion about this at three in the
     morning either but I have a feeling we’ll be talking about this later.
    Julian doesn’t say a word about my dream/nightmare last night so I don’t bring it
     up. He’s acting normal but I sense he isn’t saying something he wants to. I wonder
     if I said more than he told me. We both get ready for work in what already feels like
     a normal routine. When I get my stuff together to bring home with me, he seems annoyed
     and looks at my overnight bag with disdain.
    “What’s wrong? And don’t say nothing. It’s obvious you aren’t saying something you
     want to.”
    “Nothing is wrong, Alexa.”
    “Then why are you calling me, Alexa?”
    He smirks and answers a little sarcastically. “Because that’s your name.”
    “Uh huh. I know that. I also know you only call me that when something is wrong. Did
     you know that?”
    He shakes his head. “I’m not sure that’s true, but nothing is wrong. I have a busy
     couple of days ahead of me. I’m tired and I have to go back to Naples tomorrow or
     Friday.”
    Um, okay. Nice to know. “Why didn’t you tell me you were going out of town?”
    “Because last time I went out of town you tried to break-up with me.”
    I shrug. “Fair enough, but that’s not going to happen this time. Julian, don’t let
     my crap get in the way of your work. I don’t need that pressure too.” I put my things
     into my bag.
    “Pressure? What pressure are you feeling today, Lexie?”
    “You’re tired, which is my fault, and obviously something is bothering you. I’m sure
     it has to do with me having a nightmare. I cause all kinds of drama in your personal
     life and I don’t want to cause it in your professional life as well.”
    “Lexie, you’re not causing any problems in my professional life. I’m sorry I made
     you think that.” Once he starts talking all his thoughts come out in a rush. “I’m
     not looking forward to this trip. It’s me and my dad again, and I’m never sure what
     I’m going to get. We’re getting closer to signing these deals and it’s stressing me
     out. I was able to keep myself out of major Bywater business while I was doing all
     of the renovations on the hotel, but now I’m being sucked back in. If I don’t get
     involved it all ends up on Danny’s shoulders. He’s not ready to make all these decisions
     and he doesn’t deal with my dad the way I do. I am tired because, yes, I haven’t slept
     great lately. That’s not all your fault either. I’ve been trying to juggle a lot of
     balls and it’s keeping me up at night.” He takes a deep breath and continues. “I want
     you here with me. It makes me sleep better, which, if I’m being honest, is why I’m
     not in a great mood this morning. You’re going home tonight and I’ll be out of town
     for a few days.”
    I drop my bag on the ground and give him a hug. “It’s really not possible to be all
     things to everyone. You really aren’t responsible for making the world run.” I laugh
     a little. “I have no doubt you could, but it’s a big burden.”
    “Trust me, Corazón, I wish I could just say fuck it to a lot of things, but I can’t.
     I have a lot of people counting on me.”
    I kiss him softly. “I just hate to see you so tense. You know you can talk to me about
     this stuff, right? I know it might not seem like it, but I’m a pretty good listener.”
    He kisses me back a little deeper. “I know and I will. But right now, we need to go.”
    I squeeze him again, pick up my bag, and try not to be offended that he really doesn’t
     share his “business” with me. He’s very open about how he feels about me, but not
     so much when it comes to the rest of his life.
    Julian drops me off in front of the building, gives me a kiss, and tells me he’ll
     be back to pick me up at five-thirty to