Free Deenie by Judy Blume Page A

boys. I think we should have discussions every week. They're more important than modern dance!
    That afternoon, when I got home from school, there was a note from Ma, saying she was at the A&P with Aunt Rae. I put my books down, poured myself a glass of milk and was just about to sneak a few chocolate cookies from Ma's secret hiding place, when the phone rang.
    "Hello … " I said.
    "Mrs. Fenner?"
    "No … she isn't in right now."
    "This is Dr. Kliner's office calling … "
    When I heard that my heart started to beat very fast. "Can I take a message?" I asked, then had to clear my throat.
    "Deenie's Milwaukee Brace is ready and the doctor suggests an appointment on Friday at ten o'clock."
    "This Friday?"
    "That's right. And the doctor also suggests a change of clothes for Deenie … a size or two larger than her regular things."
    "What for?" I asked.
    "Because the brace takes up a certain amount of room and the girls can't get their regular clothes over it."
    "Oh."
    "Have Mrs. Fenner call if she can't make it on Friday. I'll be here until six."
    "I'll tell her."
    "Thank you," she sang and hung up, like she didn't even care about what she had just told me. I didn't say anything to Ma about the phone call when she got back from the market. I thought about not telling anyone. But I knew if we didn't show up on Friday Dr. Kliner's office would call to find out what happened and then Daddy and Ma would know about the first phone call and that would make me a liar. So I told them during supper. It was already past six-thirty.
    "Friday's fine with me," Daddy said. "I'll ask Joe to work that morning."
    I'd been chewing on the same piece of meat for a while but I couldn't swallow it so I held my napkin to my mouth and spit it out. "What's wrong?" Ma asked. "It was all fat," I told her. I drank some water, then took a big breath and spoke very fast. "I'm supposed to bring some other clothes to Dr. Kliner's office because mine won't fit over the brace." I looked at the food on my plate and moved some of it around with my fork.
    "Don't worry about your clothes," Ma said. "You can get all new things … can't she, Frank?"
    "Sure," Daddy said. "Never mind about that."
    "But my jeans are all broken in the way I like them!"
    "So you'll break in new jeans," Daddy said. "As many as you want."
    "And I never even wore my two new skirts and sweaters. I was saving them for when it gets cold." I could feel my throat tightening.
    "Maybe we can take them back and get the next size," Ma said.
    "You already shortened the skirts," I said.
    "So we won't return them," Daddy said. "It's not important."
    "But it's a waste of money," I told him.
    "Never mind," Daddy said again. "All that matters is getting you well."
    "I am well!"
    "You know what Daddy means," Ma said.
    Later, Helen came to my room carrying a navy skirt and a striped shirt. "You can wear these tomorrow," she said. "They're bigger than your things and they'll probably look better on you anyway." She put them down on my bed. They still had tags on them.
    Twelve
    The brace looks like the one Dr. Kliner showed us three weeks ago. It's the ugliest thing I ever saw.
    I'm going to take it off as soon as I get home. I swear, I won't wear it. And nobody can make me. Not ever! I felt like telling that to Dr. Kliner but I didn't. I had to fight to keep from crying.
    Just when I thought I was going to be okay Ma started. "Oh, my God!" she cried. "What did we ever do to deserve this?" She buried her face in a tissue and made sobbing noises that really got me sore. The louder she cried the madder I got until I shouted, "Just stop it, Ma! Will you just stop it please!"
    Dr. Kliner said, "You know, Mrs. Fenner, you're making this very hard on your daughter."
    Ma opened the door and ran out of Dr. Kliner's office.
    Daddy hugged me and said, "I'm proud of you, Deenie. You're stronger than your mother."
    I wanted to tell him I'm not. I hate just looking at the brace, never mind the thought of wearing it.
    But I