Free Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency by Douglas Adams

they then point naturally towards the right decision.  The drawback with these is that the decision which all the properly ordered and analysed facts point to is not necessarily the one you want.’
    ‘Yeeeess...’ said Reg’s voice from the kitchen.
    ‘Well, Gordon’s great insight was to design a program which allowed you to specify in advance what decision you wished it to reach, and only then to give it all the facts.  The program’s task, which it was able to accomplish with consummate ease, was simply to construct a plausible series of logical-sounding steps to connect the premises with the conclusion.
    ‘And I have to say that it worked brilliantly.  Gordon was able to buy himself a Porsche almost immediately despite being completely broke and a hopeless driver.  Even his bank manager was unable to find fault with his reasoning.  Even when Gordon wrote it off three weeks later.’
    ‘Heavens.  And did the program sell very well?’
    ‘No.  We never sold a single copy.’
    ‘You astonish me.  It sounds like a real winner to me.’
    ‘It was,’ said Richard hesitantly.  ‘The entire project was bought up, lock, stock and barrel, by the Pentagon.  The deal put WayForward on a very sound financial foundation.  Its moral foundation, on the other hand, is not something I would want to trust my weight to.  I’ve recently been analysing a lot of the arguments put forward in favour of the Star Wars project, and if you know what you’re looking for, the pattern of the algorithms is very clear.
    ‘So much so, in fact, that looking at Pentagon policies over the last couple of years I think I can be fairly sure that the US Navy is using version 2.00 of the program, while the Air Force for some reason only has the beta-test version of 1.5.  Odd, that.’
    ‘Do you have a copy?’
    ‘Certainly not,’ said Richard, ‘I wouldn’t have anything to do with it.  Anyway, when the Pentagon bought everything, they bought everything.  Every scrap of code, every disk, every notebook.  I was glad to see the back of it.  If indeed we have.  I just busy myself with my own projects.’
    He poked at the fire again and wondered what he was doing here when he had so much work on.  Gordon was on at him continually about getting the new, super version of Anthem ready for taking advantage of the Macintosh II, and he was well behind with it.  And as for the proposed module for converting incoming Dow Jones stock-market information into MIDI data in real time, he’d only meant that as a joke, but Gordon, of course, had flipped over the idea and insisted on its being implemented.  That too was meant to be ready but wasn’t.  He suddenly knew exactly why it was he was here.
    Well, it had been a pleasant evening, even if he couldn’t see why Reg had been quite so keen to see him.  He picked up a couple of books from the table.  The table obviously doubled as a dining table, because although the piles looked as if they had been there for weeks, the absence of dust immediately around them showed that they had been moved recently.
    Maybe, he thought, the need for amiable chit-chat with someone different can become as urgent as any other need when you live in a community as enclosed as a Cambridge college was, even nowadays.  He was a likeable old fellow, but it was clear from dinner that many of his colleagues found his eccentricities formed rather a rich sustained diet -- particularly when they had so many of their own to contend with.  A thought about Susan nagged him, but he was used to that.  He flipped through the two books he’d picked up.
    One of them, an elderly one, was an account of the hauntings of Borley Rectory, the most haunted house in England.  Its spine was getting raggedy, and the photographic plates were so grey and blurry as to be virtually indistinguishable.  A picture he thought must be a very lucky (or faked) shot of a ghostly apparition turned out, when he examined the caption, to be a