Free The Diary by Eileen Goudge

been letting on. Had Bob confided in her that he planned to propose tonight? She felt oddly panicky at the thought, and the fingers twined about hers, which moments before had seemed comforting, grew hot and sticky all at once.
    Oblivious to her change of mood, Bob went on in the same mild tone, “In fact, I was thinking we might make this a double celebration. Not to rain on Ingrid and Jeb’s parade or anything, but what would you say about us making the announcement tonight?” He turned to her, looking not so much hopeful as pleased with himself for having come up with such a splendid idea. In his mind, it was a done deal. All that was left to decide were the details. And why shouldn’t he think that way? Had she ever given him a reason to think otherwise?
    â€œAre you sure that’s such a good idea?” She managed to get the words past lips that had gone numb.
    He must have misunderstood, thinking she was only being considerate of Ingrid and Jeb, for he plowed on, “I was going to wait for your birthday to surprise you.” Elizabeth’s birthday was a little more than a month away. “But then I got to thinking, why wait? Our friends and family are all here, except Grammy and Grandpa—” Bob’s grandparents were away on a trip—“and we already have their blessing. Heck, we’ve even got the champagne. Seems a shame to let all that go to waste.”
    Elizabeth looked into his ruddy, beaming face, and thought, I can’t .
    I can’t say yes. I can’t say no. I can’t marry him. I can’t lose him .
    Her mind in a hopeless muddle, one fractured thought bleeding into the next, she abruptly stood up. “I’m sorry, Bob. I … I’m not feeling well. I really should go home. I’m sure it’s nothing,” she assured him at the look of concern dawning on his face. “It must have been something I ate.” Not a lie exactly: She did feel dizzy from the champagne, and her stomach was in revolt.
    Bob peered up at her worriedly. “You do look a little pale.” An instant later, he was on his feet taking hold of her elbow, as if fearful she’d topple over. “You wait here while I go get the car.” Though the evening wasn’t working out as planned, he was doing his best to swallow his disappointment.
    â€œNo, please. I’d rather walk. The fresh air will do me good.”
    He deliberated, his natural protectiveness clearly at war with the part of him that always did its best to respect her wishes. At last he reluctantly conceded, “All right. If you’re sure.”
    She squeezed his hand. “I’m sorry to spoil the evening. I’ll make it up to you, I promise.” She turned as she was stepping off the porch. “Oh, and darling? Don’t say anything to my mother. I don’t want her worrying.”
    â€œWhat do I say when she notices you’re gone?”
    She managed a wan smile. “Just tell her … I don’t know … that we had a fight.”
    Bob chuckled at the absurdity of it. Neither of them could remember the last time they’d fought.
    On her way home, teetering along the sidewalk in her high heels, which after two minutes had already made her regret having turned down Bob’s offer to drive her, Elizabeth thought about the apology she’d have to make to Ingrid in the morning. She hoped her friend wouldn’t be too sore and that she wouldn’t see through Elizabeth’s flimsy excuse and demand to know the real reason she’d left the party without even saying good-bye. If so, she’d have to lay it on thick. She also had to decide what to do about Bob’s proposal … or their presumed engagement, as he saw it. Dear, decent Bob, who was so unsuspecting …
    Lost in thought, Elizabeth didn’t notice the car passing by until it slowed to a stop at the curb. It was fully dark out, and in the glare of its headlights,