Free Survivor by Colin Thompson Page B

it’s time for a change,’ said Mrs Hulbert. ‘Time to let our hair down a bit.’
    ‘I haven’t got any to let down,’ said Mr Hulbert.
    ‘But I have,’ said Mrs Hulbert and pulled out the twenty-four hair pins that had held her hair back for so long they had begun to go rusty.
    Her long brown hair tumbled down all overMr Hulbert’s face. It was the first time in the fifteen years since he had met his wife that he had ever seen her hair out. Her hair was long and shining and beautiful and it smelled of roses, and as it fell over her husband’s face three brilliant butterflies flew out of it. Mr Hulbert began to smile, not the shy awkward smile he usually did, but the big proper smile he hadn’t done since he had been five years old.
    Then he fainted again.
    ‘I think it’s time I took him home,’ said Mrs Hulbert when her husband came round again.

    ‘Why doesn’t Ffiona stay for a sleepover?’ Mordonna suggested.
    Mrs Hulbert did her best to hide her excitement. Other people’s children had sleepovers. She’d read about them in magazines, but no one had ever asked Ffiona to go on one before. Of course it meant that Ffiona would want to ask Betty back for a sleepover at their house and that would mean at least a week getting the house really, really spotless and probably even having to buy a new toilet seat and painting the inside of the cupboard under the stairs, but it would be worth it, for Ffiona’s sake.
    So Mr and Mrs Hulbert and Claude went home. As they left the Floods’ house, Mr Hulbert said, ‘You know what, I think maybe it’s time we got a television.’

‘Winchflat, get down here this minute!’ Mordonna shouted up the stairs.
    ‘What’s the matter?’ said Winchflat.
    ‘The thing down in the cellar,’ said Mordonna. ‘The thing in the coffin. I think you better explain yourself.’
    ‘Oh, you mean Igorina. It’s nothing to worry about,’ said Winchflat.
    ‘Nothing to worry about? Nothing to worry about!’ said Mordonna. ‘What is it? I mean, who is it? I mean, where did it come from?’
    ‘It’s just Igorina,’ Winchflat explained. ‘I madeher, like in the Frankenstein movies.’
    ‘What, you mean with a bolt through her neck and the brain out of a psychotic murderer?’
    ‘No, of course not,’ said Winchflat. ‘Where would I get a brain out of a psychotic murderer? This isn’t Transylvania Waters, you know. You can’t just go into a brain shop and buy one. No, it’s an ordinary human brain. I sort of borrowed it.’
    ‘Borrowed it?’ said Mordonna suspiciously.
    ‘I got it out of an accountant while he was asleep,’ said Winchflat. ‘No one will miss it.’
    ‘Well, I imagine the accountant will.’
    ‘I doubt it,’ said Winchflat. ‘Have you ever met an accountant?’
    ‘Well, I think you’d better dismantle it and put all the bits back where you got them from.’
    ‘But … but … that would be murder,’ said Winchflat. ‘And besides, she’s my new best friend. I mean, Betty’s just got one and so have you and Satanella and even dad’s got Mr Hulbert as a sort of friend. So I want one.’
    ‘The twins haven’t got new best friends andneither have Valla or Merlinmary, so you’re not the only one.’
    ‘The twins have had new best friends ever since they were born. They’ve got each other,’ said Winchflat. ‘And Merlinmary’s got the national grid and Valla’s got a whole room full of blood corpuscles. I haven’t got anyone.’
    ‘He does have a point,’ said Nerlin.
    So it was agreed that Winchflat could keep Igorina, but he had to look after her properly and clean her cage out every day and exercise her regularly.
    ‘Though of course, you must never take her out in daylight,’ said Nerlin.
    ‘Probably not before midnight, actually,’ said Mordonna.
    ‘Can we see her?’ asked Ffiona.
    So they all went down to the coffin cellar. It was exactly as Nerlin had left it. Winchflat turned the key, pulled the chair out from under the