Free The Supreme Macaroni Company by Adriana Trigiani Page B

about the rest of my life.
    I looked up at the sky. A smattering of stars appeared in the distance over the water. I thought about what needed to be done. There were issues to sort out, feathers to unruffle, and plans to be made. Everything was going to change in my life, even the aspects that were already working.
    “It’s going to snow,” Gabriel observed. “I hate snow.”
    Gabriel dragged the lawn chairs back to the edge of the roof, where he folded and stored them.
    “Come on, it’s been a long day.” Gabriel held the door open. “And I need my rest. I have to close out 2010, and I have to find a place to live.”
    “I wish you could stay.”
    “No, thanks. Three of anything never works. It’s two by two or nothing.”
    G abriel and I had our routine in the apartment above the workroom on Perry Street. It was a kind of marriage. He took care of the cooking, and I did the cleaning. He’d taken my old bedroom after I moved into Gram’s old room. The extra bedroom was for company, and we used it a lot. New York City funnels people on their way to most other places in the world, and having the extra bedroom gave old friends and relatives a place to stay when they were passing through.
    Gabriel had fixed up the roof, upgrading it from rustic Italian to Village Rococo. He installed a washer and dryer upstairs, painted the walls, and refinished the wood floors. He always had a project going, a stack of wallpaper samples by his side. As I look back on our time together, I realize I was one of those projects.
    I looked into the bathroom mirror as I brushed my teeth. Gabriel had artfully placed a dimmer switch for the lighting fixture over the medicine cabinet. The softened light diffused all my flaws, as there is nothing worse than being over thirty and looking into the glare of headlights first thing in the morning (or the last thing at night, for that matter). I held my hand up against the mirror, taking in the white-hot diamond on my hand.
    One little ring changes everything.
    As I slipped down the dark hallway to my bedroom, I saw that Gabriel’s light was out. He’s one of those people who goes to sleep quickly and wakes up five hours later, refreshed. I’m an insomniac who tosses and turns until I surrender to sleep. As soon as I got under the covers and sank beneath my down blanket, my mind began to race.
    I began to list the changes that would come in the weeks ahead. I bundled the fears, beginning with my living situation. I knew Gabriel and I would share a work life going forward and our friendship as we always had, but we wouldn’t be living together anymore. I was sad about that transition. Leaving Gabriel was a bit like choosing a new pair of shoes over the old, comfortable loafers. I would still see him in the shop every day, because he had become our pattern cutter after June died, but he wouldn’t be there at breakfast, and he wouldn’t be there at dinner. I was trading my best friend for a husband.
    Husband! My heart filled to the brim with love when I thought of Gianluca. I’d found my partner in him. There were so many things we needed to talk about. I wanted to make Gianluca comfortable in his new home. For starters, he’d need a desk and a workspace. Closets. What else? We were going to be married in a matter of weeks. The idea of that seemed daunting, but it might be better to move quickly and begin our new life together instead of having one of those long engagements to buy time to make everything perfect. I punched the pillow and turned over.
    Whenever I couldn’t sleep, my thoughts would turn back to the ladies who nurtured my spiritual life when I was a girl. The nuns at Holy Agony taught us to examine our conscience at the end of every day. We were told to replay the events honestly and assess what we had learned, what we would change, and whom we should ask for forgiveness. I had a list as long as the Westside Highway.
    I had hurt Gianluca. My worst moment (comforting Bret) gave