Free Hidden in the Heart by Catherine West

Melanie poured steaming liquid from a blue ceramic teapot and handed Claire a cup. “Here, have some tea. When did you last eat?”
    “I don’t remember.” Claire shifted in her chair and took the tea. Her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth. She sipped and they sat in silence. Things started to come back into focus.
    “Where’s your dad?”
    “He went to a show and spent the night in New York. Nice, huh? He gets back…what time is it?” She vaguely remembered seeing Melanie heading down the hall to the kitchen some time ago but couldn’t recall letting her in the house. Hours and days molded together.
    Melanie glanced at her watch and sighed. “It’s after midnight.”
    “Oh.” Claire rubbed her eyes. “Saturday. He gets back later today I guess. What are you doing here anyway, Mel?”
    “Don’t you remember calling me?”
    “I called you?”
    “About two hours ago. I couldn’t understand what you were saying and told you to go to bed. You kept calling. When Steve put the answering machine on, I guess you tried James. Then he called me. Said you were frantic. I figured I wasn’t going to sleep anyway, worrying, so I might as well come here and make sure you didn’t do anything stupid.”
    “James didn’t come?”
    “Nope. Dropped me off, gave me his key to get in and told me to call him later.”
    “Oh.” Of course he wouldn’t have come. She’d chased him out of her life.
    Maybe for good this time.
    “I’m so tired.” Claire blinked, her eyes stinging. The past few days were a blur. Time stopped with the phone call from the DCF. She’d been surprised when they called after just two weeks. But then the caseworker gave her the news. “I can’t believe she refused to release the information. It’s not like I’m asking for blood, or a kidney even. I just…want…to know where I came from. I want answers.”
    Melanie sat in the chair opposite her and stared, tears shimmering in her eyes. She cradled her belly and shook her head. “I don’t know why she wouldn’t allow them to give you anything, Claire. I’m sure she has her reasons.”
    “I’m sure she’s just being a—”
    “Claire.”
    “What?” She let go a deep sigh and shrank under Melanie’s sorrowful gaze. “Shouldn’t you be in the hospital by now? When’s that baby due?”
    Melanie smiled. “Any day now, I hope. He or she is taking their own sweet time, that’s for sure. I’ll be induced on Monday if nothing happens before then.”
    Claire sat forward and put her head in her hands. The buzz was wearing off, sobriety kicking in. That was the day after tomorrow. Her throat grew thick.
    “Claire?”
    “I’m okay.”
    The baby would be here soon. She’d have to see it, see how happy Melanie and Steve were…then she’d have to face James and deal with her own inability to find it in her heart to even think about giving their marriage another try.
    “I’m sorry you didn’t get the news you wanted, Claire, but I wish…”
    “I know. It’s okay.” Claire raised her head and waited for her nausea to pass. “I’ll survive.”
    “You were doing so well.” Melanie bit her lip and nodded, as though she’d made up her mind. “I’m really worried about you. We all are. Will you please get some help? I know you think you can do it on your own, but…”
    “No.” Claire put down her cup, drew her legs up under her and sighed. “I
can
quit on my own. You know I can. You just said I was doing really well.”
    “You were.
Were,
being the operative word. Claire, you were passed out when I got here and you don’t remember calling me.”
    “A setback.”
    “Claire...” Melanie’s voice quavered. “Please. Let us help you. You don’t have to do this alone. You know that, right?”
    Claire closed her eyes again.
    After her mother died, she’d had trouble sleeping. She hadn’t taken anything because of her pregnancy. But then a week after the funeral, she started bleeding. It was over. Nomore