Free Twice a Bride by Mona Hodgson Page A

the look of the gray wall shrouding Pikes Peak and the Sangre de Cristos, the surrounding mountains were still getting pounded.
    Dodging a mud puddle at the end of the walkway, Willow started up the hill toward the First Congregational Church, where her brother served aspastor. The steeple towered above rooftops, a beacon of faith and hope, and the white-trimmed parsonage, including a picket fence, stood behind the brick church building. The rosebushes lining the graveled walkway to the parsonage had recently been pruned.
    Willow wiped the bottoms of her shoes on the rag rug. Before she could knock on the door, a lace curtain fluttered at the window, and Ida peered out at her. Soon Ida stood in the doorway, tears running down her face.
    After closing the door behind them, Willow took Ida’s hand and led her into the parlor. “Tucker isn’t home?”
    Ida wiped her tears. “He went to the hospital to visit one of our parishioners.”
    Help me, Lord. Give me the words You would speak to her .
    Willow refused to ask her sister-in-law if she was all right. The answer was obvious. So obvious she couldn’t fathom asking Ida to return to work on a regular basis. Swallowing her regret, Willow looked up at the first painting she’d done upon her arrival in Cripple Creek. A bank of fog obscured the top of Pikes Peak. The fog was beginning to clear for her, but not yet for Ida.
    As soon as possible she’d send Mr. Van Der Veer a note by courier to let him know she couldn’t accept the job as portrait painter. Her sister-in-law needed her still.
    Ida wiped more tears from her face and seated herself on the sofa. “I don’t know what’s gotten into me.”
    “Grief has gotten into you.” Willow sat in the rocker across from her. “You are the wife and the big sister trying to be strong for everyone else’s sake.”
    “Vivian was here yesterday. She might be having her baby soon.” Red rimmed Ida’s blue eyes. “I should be feeling better by now.”
    “When Sam died, my grief took me down an unforeseeable path. For a long time.”
    “But I didn’t lose my husband.” Ida wiped her eyes. “I hadn’t even felt mybaby kick or roll as Kat has. I hadn’t held my baby. I don’t even know if it was a boy or a girl.”
    “But he or she was already a part of you. A life you and Tucker had created and anticipated.”
    Ida pressed her lips together and nodded. “It’s hard to explain, but I already felt like a mother.”
    Willow squeezed Ida’s hand. “You haven’t talked to your sisters about this, have you?”
    “I couldn’t. Nell hasn’t been able to conceive. Vivian is nearly ready to deliver her first baby, and Kat is carrying another child. They don’t need to be thinking about my problems.”
    Willow nodded. She understood wanting to protect those around her. “You know how Sam died.”
    “Yes. Tucker told me Sam went into the river after him, and about how he blamed himself when Sam drowned.”
    Willow’s heart raced after the memory, but she had to keep going. “Tucker wasn’t to blame. No one was.” Willow breathed another prayer for grace and guidance. “And because I was Tucker’s big sister and loved him dearly, I tried to protect my brother from my grief. I felt I had to in order to assuage his grief, to comfort him, and to assure him Sam’s death was an accident and he wasn’t responsible.”
    “It’s what big sisters do.”
    “Yes, but we need to be comforted too.”
    Ida nodded, her lips quivering.
    “You’ve been worried about Tucker. And about me.”
    Another nod.
    “You’ve been concerned about how your sisters feel because of their own pregnancies.” Willow met Ida’s gaze as she remembered Maria’s wise counsel. “We have to look our own grief in the face before we can receive and accept the comfort we need.”
    A slight smile began to clear the clouds from Ida’s blue eyes. “I’m so glad you stopped by.” She straightened her back. “I know I haven’t thanked you