Free Lost by Sarah Ann Walker

out so much in one day I felt like I was talking to a man I had known for years, as opposed to a man I had only spoken to for 4 hours.

 
      When we eventually arrived at my place it was awkward though.  I didn't want the day to end, but I didn't want to jump in bed with him either.  I wasn't ready for him to leave me yet, but I didn’t know how to ask him to stay.  I was happy and excited to know more about Peter.  So when he nervously asked if he could call me, I said yes. 
      Turning toward him I was going to give him my phone number but he said he already had it.  But when I questioned how, he said simply, Caller ID.
  “Then why didn't you call me all week?” I asked confused.
  “You didn't give me your number on purpose, and you didn't say I could call,” he replied easily.
  “Okay, well, you can call me,” I whispered finding myself standing closer to him than absolutely necessary.
  Practically standing against him, Peter surprised me when he said quietly, “I’m going to kiss you tomorrow, Sophie, after we've had a chance to come down a little from this high.  I really want to remember our first kiss, so I want to wait, okay?”
  “Okay...” I whispered again.
  Standing at my door I was becoming a total Barbie tart with Peter and I knew it.  I wasn't sure how to change it as it happened though, but I was aware of my breathy, moany behavior and I really wanted to be embarrassed by my behavior.  I wanted to pull myself together and act like the Sophie I knew, but I just couldn't.  I was smitten and enthralled by the feeling of being with him.
  Unbelievably, when Peter turned to leave me with a smile I wanted to beg him to come into my apartment anyway.  I wanted to cook him dinner and share my favorite chocolate with him.  I wanted to kiss him, and talk to him, and make him fall in love with me.
  Jolting in the hallway, I remember stunning myself back to reality with that quick thought.  Hiding my surprise at myself I smiled at Peter while opening my door as he walked away telling me he'd call me later.
  Turning to lock my door behind me, I remember leaning against my closet thinking wow.
 
  I was stunned by my behavior and thought processes, or lack thereof.  I had spent 4 hours with some stranger and I was thinking about wanting him to fall in love with me.  I was actually thinking like an idiot, destined for heartbreak.
 
     
      Moving from the little doorway, I sat down on my couch and tried to think clearly.  I knew I didn't make men fall in love with me.  I never made anyone fall in love with me, nor did I give it a thought as it happened.   If it happened and they weren't my forever I tried to stay and work at the relationship until it wasn’t working and then I moved on.  I knew I didn’t force anything, but I felt like I kind of wanted to with Peter.
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    CHAPTER 7
     
     
     
      I spoke to Peter later Sunday evening when he eventually called me.  I waited for him to call, even though I was dying to call him.  I waited because he said he would call, and I didn't want to look desperate if I called him first.
  Settled in on my couch, Peter and I spoke for an hour and a half, learning more and more about each other.  Actually, I learned more about him, only answering a few questions when they were posed to me because I was still nervous about giving away too much information about myself.
  I wanted my privacy.  Well, truthfully, I wanted to seem a little mysterious because I found myself wanting to play this relationship right.  I wanted to be everything Peter wanted from a woman though we hadn't actually had that conversation yet.
  Peter and I spoke on the phone until he absolutely had to leave for work he said with regret.  I learned that his job was nightshift work, so he worked at night during the week, and