Free The Confidence Myth by Helene Lerner Page B

being successful in business requires building strong relationships. But do we take enough time to do it? With constant deadlines to adhere to, we may rationalize that sitting at our desks uninterrupted and using the phone and Internet to contact people is enough.
    Yes, excelling at our day-to-day tasks is important, and you may be recognized for the excellence of your work, but will that lead to access to higher-ups who can put your name on a slate when a job opens up? Possibly, but don’t assume that will happen. Take every opportunity to meet the power players. Get out of your familiar surroundings, and seek out opportunities to mix with those calling the shots.
    In the last several years, a lot of buzz has been circulating about sponsors and what they can do to help womenadvance. In
Smart Women Take Risks
I wrote, “Opportunities happen when someone in charge believes in you and takes a chance on your behalf by opening a door.” 1 That someone in charge is a sponsor.
    The main difference between mentors and sponsors is that the sponsor relationship is transactional, according to Sylvia Hewlett, author of
Forget a Mentor, Find a Sponso
r. She writes, “A sponsor sees furthering your career as an important investment in his or her
own
career, organization, or vision. Sponsors may advise or steer you, but their chief role is to develop you as a leader. Your role is to earn their investment in you.” 2
    Men have had the benefit of others bringing them along more than women have, partly because of our late entry into the workforce. But there is another reason why we may not have attracted these valuable supporters. As women, we are drawn toward people we like; however, the people who can best sponsor us are not necessarily going to be people we like or who are anything like us. As Hewlett explains, what matters in sponsorship is “trust, not affinity.” 3
    Michelle Gadsden-Williams, managing director and global head of diversity and inclusion at Credit Suisse, believes that “finding a sponsor whose path or background is different from yours is an excellent learning opportunity. They’ll do what’s expected—talk you up at meetings when a position becomes available—but they can also give you a different perspective that you might not have had access to otherwise. And you will have something to teach them as well.” 4
    We must create strategic alliances with sponsors—whether we like them or not—and show them our loyalty as well as our ability to produce results. These people can catapult our careers. This chapter offers concrete ways for women to cultivate these important alliances.
How to stand out? Deliver!
    Produce results by doing your job with energy and enthusiasm. Walk around and get to know people. In meetings, bring your innovative ideas to the table. Take these actions and you will likely get noticed.
    The benefits of speaking up and delivering are numerous, and they feed on each other to build your career and your confidence. Producing results increases your chances of getting noticed. What’s more, according to 86 percent of the survey respondents who reported feeling confident in the workplace, “using my skills and making an impact” had enhanced their confidence in their own abilities. Then when your achievements are acknowledged and you are singled out for more responsibility, you get another confidence boost. About 70 percent of question respondents said that “acknowledgment from my peers, direct reports, and leaders” also increased their confidence.
    As you make your mark, people will likely start paying attention. Several of the women I interviewed attracted sponsors as a result of excellent performance.
    â€œThe best relationships come from people who take an interest in you because they see what you are doing and want to help,” shared Sandra Dewey of Turner Entertainment and Cartoon Network. She got the attention of