Free How to Write a Brilliant Romance: The Easy, Step-By-Step Method of Crafting a Powerful Romance (Go! Write Something Brilliant) by Susan May Warren Page B

Just wanted to look nice. How was work?”
    “You always look nice.”
    “I do? The baby spit up on my other outfit.”
    (See how that little, "I do?" interjects vulnerability? That’s a Zinger of a different sort. It jolts the conversation out of the ordinary.)
    “Of course. Even with spit-up. What’s for supper?”
    (And of course, what he says softens the conversation even more.)
    “I haven’t even thought about it, what with Jimmy’s soccer club and Amy’s school project. And I have choir practice tonight. I s’pose I could throw in a frozen pizza, again.”
    “We had that last night.”
    “So, you don’t want pizza? I don’t know–”
    “Pizza is more than fine, honey. Just perfect, really.”
    “By the way, I don’t want pizza either. But the kids do, and that’s what matters. I’ll throw some extra pepperoni on, just for you.”
    Samemotivations,butdifferentoutcomes,withafewtweaks.Thethingis,behindeverylinethereis amotivation,ameaning,andyouneedtokeepthegoalsoftheconversationforeachcharacterin frontofyouasyouwrite.
    ButeventhisisjustmundanedialogueuntilIaddanothertwoelementsofSizzle:ExternalActivity and BodyLanguage
    Everydialoguescenehastohave activity that contains meaning .Whenweareinascene,justtohave themreactingwiththeirbodyortonemakesforamundanescene.Apersoncanonlysmileso much.Soyouwanttowrapuptheirwordsinactionsthatdeepentheirwords.Givethemsomething todothataccentuatestheirwords:kneadingbread,asshe’skeepinghervoicelightandtellingher husbandthatit’sjustfinethathecamehomehourslatewithoutcallingisagreatwaytoconveythat no,it’snotallwell,asshepoundsthebreadtoapulp.Then,whenyouaddbodylanguage,itmeans something.
    HerearethreelinesfromasnippetofdialoguewithouttheExternalActionsandBodyLanguage
    “Idon’tcarewhereyou’regoing.Stayoutallnightifyouwantto.Infact,I hope you have a great time.”
    Simpledialogue,butnowlet’saddactionsthatcontainmeaningandsomefrugalbodylanguage:
    “ I don’t care where you’re going.” Janice barely looked up from her book ashe stood by the door. “Stay out all night if you want to.” She put a thumb overthe paragraph to keep her place. Looked up and smiled—the kind of smileshe usedtogivehimwhenshedidtrusthim.Whenhedeservedhertrust.
    “Infact,I hope you have a greattime.”
    Heclosedthedoor,hatinghimselfasitlatchedbehindhim.
    Noticethatshedoesn'tevenusetoneofvoice,justheractionsshowthatshe'sreachedapointof notcaring.Now,let'slookatanotherway,samewords:
    “ Idon’tcarewhereyou’regoing.”Janicedumpedthebakedpotatoesintothegarbage.
    “Stayoutallnightifyouwantto.”Sheflashedhimasmileasshethrewthecasserolepanintothesink,turnedonthewaterfullblast.Sheforcedherselfnottowinceasitsplashedherface. “ Infact,Ihopeyouhaveagreattime.”
    She grabbed the towel and very, very slowly, wiped her face, keeping the towel there until she heard the soft click of the door closing behind her husband.
    Okay,oneofthedifferencesisthattheseareintwodifferentPOVs.Again,Ididn'tuseanyvoice tones,justactionsbehindthewordsandthebarestamountofbodylanguage.
    Note:Therightbalancebetweenmeaningfulactionandbodylanguagewill feel natural.Tryto balancethemoutwithtwotothreesentencesofmeaningfulaction,withbodylanguagethrownin nowandagaintoseetheirface.Mostofthetime,however,youwanttheactiontospeakjustas loudlyasthewords.
    Let’stakeourearliersceneandaddmeaningfulactionandbodylanguage;
    Frank came in, plopping his briefcase on the counter. “What’s theoccasion?” He pulled off his tie, picked up the mail, sorted through it.Janicesmoothedherdress,tookabreath.“Nooccasion.Ijustwantedtolooknice.Howwaswor--?”
    “ Youalwayslooknice.”Heheldupanenvelopetothelight,squinting.
    Janicepickedupanonion,startedtochopitforthecasseroleshewasmakingfor church. “ The baby spit up on my other outfit.”
    “ What’s for supper?”
    She wiped her eyes as they began to water.
    “I haven’t even thought about it, what with Jimmy’s soccer club and Amy’s school project. And I have choir practice