Free The Secret Year by Jennifer R. Hubbard

thought they’d figure it out when you started seeing Jackie. The rest of us kept falling over you two making out in every room of the house. I was sure they’d ask themselves, ‘Hey, why doesn’t Tom have a girl over? Why isn’t Tom swapping spit with his girlfriend on the living-room couch?’ But I guess people see what they want to see. At least you noticed something, didn’t you?”
    I shrugged. “Maybe. I never thought about it, but it didn’t shock me or anything. It’s like I knew it without thinking about it.” I pointed to his twelve-foot wooden tower in the backyard. “Now I have new insight into your sculpture, though.”
    “What do you mean?”
    “Well, we learned about phallic symbols in psych class—”
    He laughed. “The symbolism wasn’t intentional, believe me.”
    Mom opened the door then. “Colt, Syd’s on the phone for you.”
    “Okay, thanks.” I went inside and found my parents picking through the leftovers. Apparently they’d gotten their appetites back. My dad scowled at a bowl of squash, but it was my mother’s face I watched. When Dad got upset, he would sulk on the sofa or drink until he passed out. Mom was the one who flared up and sometimes gave a whack or two to whoever was nearest. She also cooled down faster than he did, though. He could hold a grudge for years. I left plenty of room between them and me as I passed through the kitchen to my room.
    I told Syd about our Thanksgiving to Remember, and she told me about her split holiday (morning with her mom, afternoon with her dad). “Should I come over tomorrow?” she said. “I can’t wait to see you.”
    “I don’t know. This is the first time I’ve seen my brother in a couple of months.”
    “Tommy won’t mind. He knows me.”
    “I don’t know, Syd.”
    “Don’t you want to see me?”
    What could I say to that? “Sure. I have to work at four, though.”
    “I can come over at noon. How’s that?”
    “Okay,” I said, trying not to sound like I was making an appointment to have my teeth drilled.
    “See you then.”
    I hung up and threw myself on my bed. I’d judged Julia pretty harshly for always saying she was going to break up with Austin Chadwick and never doing it, but now I was starting to see that it wasn’t so easy.

chapter 10
    Syd, Tom, and I shot targets in the backyard when she came over the next day. After she left, while I was getting ready for work, Tom came into my room and said, “So, you’re going out with her now?”
    “Sort of.”
    He sat on my bed. “Well, don’t sound so excited.”
    “I kind of got dragged into it.” Then I told him about how Syd had reached out for me the day her parents broke up, how I hadn’t wanted to pull away from her then.
    “So you don’t like her?”
    “Not that way.”
    “You’re not doing her any favors, you know.”
    “Probably not.” I plowed through my closet, looking for the bottom half of my uniform.
    “The longer you let this go on, the worse it’s going to get.”
    “I guess so.” For some reason I didn’t want to face him, but I finally turned around. He gave me that wise-older-brother look that used to give me a pain in the ass. It didn’t bother me as much today, maybe because I knew he was right.
    “Believe me,” he said, pointing his finger at me like a gun, “no good comes from lying about what you really want.”
     
    The restaurant was busier than I’d expected. Apparently people were sick of their leftovers already. Michael Vernon came in around eight. He had coffee and a doughnut and read a book while he ate. “Where’s Kirby?” I asked him.
    “At her grandmother’s,” he said, without looking up.
    “How’d you get here, anyway?” I was pretty sure he couldn’t drive yet.
    “Rode my bike.” He turned a page, still without lifting his head. I left him alone after that. I could never quite figure him out. Sometimes he talked to me like a normal person, and other times he acted as if every word out of his