Free The Personal Shopper by Carmen Reid

head and neck shorter than her, making her feel like an overgrown freak.
    ‘Your nephew’s at St Vincent’s!’ she exclaimed, because they had just made this discovery. ‘Small world.’
    He gave the little wince again. Ooops.
    As the first course had arrived, they began to talk about favourite foods; vegetables, to be precise.
    ‘Aubergine in a tomato ragout,’ he was telling her.
    ‘Dwarf beans, steamed with butter, delicious,’ Annie said.
    Dwarf?? Why did she have to say dwarf? Wasn’t ‘beans’ description enough?
    Lloyd shot her a wink. Was he just being friendly or had he noticed her unfortunate choice of words? By the way, that was Lloyd, property developer, divorced, no children, large house in Wimbledon, hobbies: jazz and windsurfing – Lucinda had her uses.
    ‘Have you been dinner dating long?’ she asked Dominic, changing direction away from miniature food.
    ‘A year or so,’ he admitted.
    ‘Met any interesting people?’ She wondered if he’d had more luck than her.
    ‘Lots. Lots of interesting people – but nothing serious.’
    After a few moments of attempting to make chit-chat with taciturn Will, Annie turned back to Dominic as it was hard to wrestle Lloyd from Lucinda’s focused attention for more than a moment or two.
    ‘I love her, she’s adorable . . .’ Dominic was telling Maisie about his long-standing admiration for the French actress Audrey Tatou.
    ‘Oh, I feel the same way about Billy Crystal,’ Annie chipped in. ‘Although he’s obviously tiny.’ It was out of her mouth before she could even think about it.
    Dominic’s smile was definitely too tight at the edges.
    ‘So, tell me about your gardening work?’ she asked, deciding any sort of apology would just make things worse.
    This turned out to be a good question. Dominic was very enthusiastic about his job and talked with animation about the Modern Garden.
    Annie and several other diners listened closely, chipping in with questions about their own little plots, wondering if he could offer a few tips. This was one of   the many sad things about getting older, Roddy always used to joke; suddenly everyone’s as interested in gardens and where to score the best bedding plants as they used to be in drugs. Bird-watching no longer meant checking out the hot chicks, but setting out feeding tables and encouraging the starlings. ‘From big tits to blue tits: it’s downhill all the way,’ had been Roddy’s take on it.
    ‘It’s not growing, it’s just so . . . stumpy.’ Aaargh! Wasn’t there another word she could have used to describe a hedge that was failing to thrive? ‘So totally, well, you know, not . . . bushy,’ she managed.
    ‘Stunted?’ Lloyd offered, suppressing a smirk.
    Annie had a sneaking suspicion that silent Will and Mousie Maisie were in fact smouldering with passion: they kept trying to take furtive glances at each other and blushing when they got caught. If only they could pluck up the courage to say slightly more than hello.
    But just as she was wondering how to draw them into a conversation together, she heard Dominic tell Lucinda that he drove a mini-van. At this, she turned, caught Lloyd’s eye and heard him give a snort of laughter which he quickly suppressed by drinking a mouthful of wine.
    She smiled at him knowingly, feeling pleased that they had this secret communication going.
    Fortunately Dominic didn’t seem to notice . . . but it was talk of the midget gems that brought things to a head.
    The conversation had moved on to favourite childhood sweets and out popped Annie’s revelation: ‘Midget gems.’
    It wasn’t a lie. Along with Caramac bars, these were her top nostalgia trip treats.
    ‘Midget gems?’ Dominic asked a touch coldly and with obvious disbelief. ‘ Midget gems? I’ve never heard of those.’
    ‘They were very tiny, multicoloured, iced biscuits,’ she stumbled.
    He didn’t look convinced. Suddenly she wasn’t so sure either. Maybe there was no such thing.