Free Shalia's Diary by Tracy St. John

gym.
     
    I don’t like sex, but the sudden vision I had of Dusa laying on top of me, kissing and touching me all over, brought a stab of want to my lower parts.  I felt wetness seeping from me.
     
    Extremely shocked and somewhat terrified at my reaction to him, I jerked my gaze away to study the few purple and white flowers in the bed before us.  “You don’t have to work right now?”
     
    With our bodies touching the way they were, I felt his voice as much as I heard it.  It rumbled low and dangerous, like the sound of thunder closing in.  “I’m working only single shifts for the next couple of days.  I was on my way to visit you when I saw you on the path.”
     
    Sure he was coming to visit me.  His lie settled some of that weird reaction I was having to him.  I was able to breathe again.  “That’s very nice, Dusa.  I’m glad you came along when you did.”
     
    He leaned down, tilting his head to get a better look at my face.  “You look wonderful, Shalia.  Healthier.  I think you’ve even put on a little weight.”
     
    “Nayun finally let me eat something besides broth and nutrient mush yesterday.  I tried some ronka and pilchok.  It’s very good.”
     
    He grinned at me.  “Brave girl.  Most Earthers won’t taste our food.  They insist on eating their own, though the cooks struggle with such unfamiliar ingredients.”
     
    “No kidding.  Someone should tell them when chicken hits 165 degrees Fahrenheit, it’s done.”
     
    Dusa chuckled.  “I’ll be sure to pass that along.”
     
    We were silent for a few moments.  It wasn’t a comfortable silence, not when he still had his arm around me and I could feel every breath he took.  Looking to fill the quiet I asked, “Have you rescued anymore of us?”
     
    He nodded.  “Three women and five children since you came in.  The last I heard, they were all doing well.”

 
    “That’s nice.  So you’ve had the chance to visit them since you brought them in?”
     
    He looked at me, and I felt captured by his gaze.  I couldn’t look away for the life of me.  “I’ve only visited you.”
     
    I just sat there, staring like someone who’s been hypnotized.  I mean, what do you say to that?  Finally I choked out, “How did I get so lucky?”
     
    I have no idea why I said such a thing.  I’m not even sure what I meant by it.  But there was no doubt in how Dusa took my statement.
     
    “I like you, Shalia.  I like your spirit.  Your strength.  You fought for yourself and your mother until you no longer could.”  He laughed.  “I think you might have fought forever if you hadn’t become so ill.”
     
    I swallowed.  The way he looked at me ... well, it just knocked the air out of my lungs.  I’ve been looked at sexually before.  Men who had the power to get me in their beds took full advantage of it.  But no one had ever stared at me the way Dusa did.  It wasn’t just bald, ugly lust in his eyes.  There was also fascination and deep consideration.  It was as if he didn’t simply want me so he could demonstrate his power or get his selfish pleasure.  I got a sense of something like reverence.  It’s impossible to really describe since I’m not sure of what exactly it was.
     
    I know one thing for sure though.  Whatever that emotion was that he was communicating made me completely lose my mind.  When he lifted my chin, I didn’t resist.  When his face closed in to kiss me, I didn’t shy away. 
     
    His lips moved against mine, soft and gentle, like the brush of a bird’s feather.  I forgot how to think.  It was like all I could do was feel.  My mouth opened a little, seeking more.  Dusa’s tongue crept in, tasting me a bit at a time. 
     
    I felt like I melted inside.  I went weak all over again, like I would fall.  As if sensing it, Dusa held me tight against him, deepening the kiss.  His tongue swept inside my mouth, raspy like the finest sandpaper.  It stroked mine, and the heat