Free After Alex Died by Dakota Madison Page A

I’d be able to say that Cameron Connelly did something to help me but I guess that day had arrived.
    I wasn’t sure how I felt about it, though.

     

Week Two
    “Are you ready yet?” Cameron asked as he sat down at the lunch table with me. Antonio had decided to take Sofia to Subway for lunch rather than having to endure the cafeteria food again. Since it was free for me to eat as a counselor in the program, I planned on eating every meal in the cafeteria regardless of how edible—or inedible—it appeared to be.
    “Ready for what?” I asked, even though I had an idea what he meant: the speech to the kids about bullying.
    He raised an eyebrow. “Seriously?”
    I sighed. “No, I’m not ready yet.”
    “Well, you’d better get ready.”
    My eyes narrowed. “You are not planning to do what I think you’re planning to do.”
    “I am.”
    “Please don’t.”
    Cameron turned to face me. “Look at me.”
    I put my fork down and looked into Cameron’s eyes. “Ha ppy?”
    “I haven’t been happy in a long time but that’s another issue. We’re talking about making you happy.”
    That caught me off guard. I didn’t expect Cameron to say he wasn’t happy. And why did he care whether or not I was happy?
    “Exactly how is talking about Alex’s death to a room full of kids going to make me happy?”
    “Your life has to be about more than Alex’s death. I don’t think you’ve given yourself permission to let him go. I think this could be a first step.”
    “And what are you, some kind of psychologist? Do you think you’re my grief counselor or something?”
    “Probably the or something fits.”
    “And why should I trust you?”
    “You’re already at the bottom anyway. You pretty much have nothing to lose.”
    He had a point. I had to give him credit for making some good points.
    “Okay,” I agreed finally. “I’ll do it. But if it makes things worse, it’s your fault.”
    “It already is, isn’t it? Don’t you already blame me for Alex’s death?”
    I nodded.
    He shrugged. “Well, then you probably couldn’t hate me a nymore than you already do anyway.”
    “I don’t hate you,” I admitted , and was just as surprised as he was when the words came out of my mouth.
    “That’s a step in the right direction then.”
    “And exactly what direction is that?” I asked.
    “I already told you. I’m taking you down the road to your happiness.”
    The road to my happiness? What did he mean by that?
    He continued. “And I’m taking you down that road, even if I have to take you kicking and screaming.”
    “Why am I so important to you all of a sudden?”
    “All of a sudden?” He let out a single laugh. “Is that what you think?”
    “If we hadn’t ended up as counselors in this program I doubt you would have ever given me a second thought.”
    Our eyes met and I was suddenly extremely uncomfortable. A small part of me felt attracted to Cameron. I tried to bury that feeling deep inside but it kept rearing its ugly head.
    “I don’t believe in coincidences.” Cameron continued staring at me and his gaze grew intense. “There’s a reason we ended up here together. I think you and I both know that.”
    “Are you talking about some kind of karma or something like that?”
    “Yeah, something like that. I want you to know that there hasn’t been a day that’s gone by in the last two years that I haven’t thought about both you and Alex.”
    I found it hard to believe. The Cameron I knew was a selfish prick who didn’t care about anyone but himself. The person sitting beside me was not the Cameron I knew. Or at least the one I thought I knew. I was so confused.
    I rose. “I’ve got to get going. I need to brush my teeth before the afternoon classes start.”   
    “We’re all meeting in the auditorium.”
    I gulped. That meant it was go time. I had to get ready to face one of my biggest fears.
     
    ***
     
    I could feel my heartbeat quicken as I entered the auditorium. The kids