Free In My Skin by Cassidy Ryan Page A

was that last sentence that gave me hope. While mom sat on the edge of one of the sofas, I sat a little stiffly on the one opposite. Clutching her purse on her lap, mom looked around her.
    "This is a lovely place. Very ... trendy?” She said the word like she wasn't quite sure of it.
    "Yes, it is lovely, and quite trendy I suppose.” There was a long silence broken only by the sounds of Chaise puttering around in the kitchen, taking far longer to make the tea than was necessary.
    "Do you spend a lot of time here?” Mom was still looking around her, like she wasn't quite able to meet my eyes.
    "More and more it seems.” I smiled and was surprised to find that it was easier than I would have thought.
    There was another long silence, then mom finally looked at me, looked right at me, and I had the oddest feeling that for the first time ever she was really trying to see me.
    "I've always been proud of you, you know.” I hadn't expected that, and it left me speechless for a moment.
    "You—you have?” I was finally able to ask.
    She smiled, and it lit up her eyes. “When you won that scholarship to college I told everyone I met for weeks afterwards—I'm sure I told everyone more than once. Then when you did so well at law school?” She laughed lightly. “Well, I think that people started to avoid me so that they wouldn't have to listen to me boasting about my brilliant daughter."
    Stunned, I could only stare open-mouthed. “But ... but you never said anything to me. Why didn't you ever tell me ?"
    She looked down at her hands. “Because, I suppose in spite of my pride in your accomplishments, I really didn't understand you—you were right about that.” She shook her head, but I got the feeling that it was more about her than me. “But it wasn't just that.” She looked at me again, and her eyes seemed to implore me. “Oh, Anna. I have found such happiness and fulfillment in being a wife and mother. I was so afraid that you were going to get so caught up in your career that you would never know that kind of contentment. I can see now how you could have confused my concern for disappointment, and to apologize seems so inadequate, but I truly am sorry."
    I was granted a moment to gather my wits as Chaise brought over a tray with two cups of tea and a plate of cookies. She set it on the coffee table and went back to the kitchen.
    I picked up my cup and held it between my hands just for something to do.
    "When you told me about your relationship with Chaise it was like all my fears had come to life—no husband, no children...” A frown drew her eyebrows together.
    "Just because I'm sharing my life with another woman doesn't mean that I'll never be a mother.” I wanted to reach out and touch her, to reassure her. “It's not what I want right now, but who knows what will happen a couple of years down the line?"
    She nodded. “I understand that. I do. I've done nothing but think about it for two days. It's just ... when you first told me...” She shrugged as if she had run out of words.
    I put my cup back on the table and went to sit beside her, but still not touching. “I'm not going to change, Ma, you get that, right?"
    She nodded, and without looking at me she reached over and gently laid her hand on mine. It said more than any words could. After a moment of quiet, she patted my hand and stood. “I should get back. I left your dad to fend for himself—he's probably burned down the kitchen."
    I laughed at that and stood beside her. “I wouldn't be in the least surprised."
    She was looking unsure again, and I instinctively reached out and hugged her. After a brief pause she returned the embrace.
    "Oh, and just for the record?” She pulled back and held me at arms length. “I'm very glad you're not Lacy. That girl doesn't have the brains she was born with—just look at that useless lump she married!” There was a little twinkle of mischief in her eye that reminded me of exactly why I hadn't called her on her