Two Miserable Presidents

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Authors: Steve Sheinkin
Belle Rebelle”—the beautiful rebel.
    Whenever You’re Ready, George
    N ow it’s time to check in on General George McClellan. We haven’t missed much—he’s still inching forward. And Lincoln is still begging him to speed up. “You must act,” Lincoln telegraphed.
    â€œThe time is very near when I shall attack Richmond,” McClellan insisted.
    But Mac wanted more information before moving forward. He turned to an inventor named Thaddeus Lowe, who had built huge balloons in which he could float hundreds of feet above the enemy camp. Since there was no way to control the balloons in the air, they were tied to the ground with very long ropes.
    Early one morning the Union general Fitz John Porter decided to have a look at the Confederate camp. He climbed into the basket, inflated the balloon, and started floating up. Then there was a sudden CRACK!—the rope holding the balloon to the ground snapped in half. Thousands of sleepy Union soldiers looked up and saw General Porter leaning out of the basket, waving his hands and yelling something that no one could hear.
    â€œOpen the valve!” shouted Thaddeus Lowe, pointing up to a rope connected to the valve that would let out the hydrogen gas that
made the balloon rise. Soldiers ran along under the balloon yelling, “The valve! The valve! Open the valve!” But Porter couldn’t reach the valve. He kept floating up, up, and away … out over Confederate territory.
    Deciding to make the best of it, Porter took out his telescope and started studying the enemy camp. Confederate soldiers shot at the balloon but couldn’t reach it. Both armies watched in amazement as shifting winds blew Porter back and forth, finally sending him crashing into an army tent—luckily for him, a Union army tent. Porter climbed out from the folds of the deflated balloon, unhurt.
    Seven Days with Granny Lee
    T hrough the rainy, muddy May of 1862, McClellan’s army continued pushing forward. By late May, Union forces were just six miles from Richmond. They could see the city’s church steeples and hear the clocks striking. The men cheered when Mac visited them:

    McClellan: How do you feel, boys?
    Soldiers: We feel bully, General!
    McClellan: Do you think anything can stop you from going to Richmond?
    Soldiers: No! No!

    Robert E. Lee disagreed.
    With his polite manners, his white hair, and his glasses, Robert E. Lee didn’t seem like a warrior. In fact, some folks in Richmond had taken to calling him “Granny Lee” (behind his back, of course). But soldiers who knew Lee painted a very different picture. As one Confederate officer said: “He will take more chances, and take them quicker, than any other general in this country, North or South.”
    Step one for Lee was to find out exactly where the enemy army was. He didn’t have balloons, but he did have Jeb Stuart, a twenty-nine-year-old cavalry officer with a giant cinnamon-colored beard and a foot-long ostrich feather in his hat. Eager for action and fame, Stuart gladly accepted the dangerous mission of riding out and locating McClellan’s army.

    â€œAnd if I find the way open, it may be that I can ride all the way around him. Circle his whole army.

    Jeb Stuart
    And that’s exactly what he did. Stuart led 1,200 men on a three-day, hundred-mile ride around McClellan’s entire army. Losing just one man, Stuart’s force burned wagons full of Union supplies and brought back hundreds of Union prisoners. Stuart got famous. McClellan got embarrassed. And Lee got the information he needed.
    Then, in a series of brutal battles known as the Seven Days, Lee attacked McClellan every day for a week. “Come on; come on, my men! Do you want to live forever?” shouted a Confederate officer to his charging soldiers. The Union soldiers staggered backwards, fighting their guts out but steadily losing ground. The casualties were enormous—a total

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