Free Shattered Dreams by Brenda Kennedy

putting it into the coat closet. He smiles at me
and walks over to retrieve his letters from the coffee table. “I’ll
be right back,” he says as he walks outside with his letters in
hand.  
    I have to smile because that is the same
thing Max would say. Max always said, “I’ll be right back,”
whenever he left. I watch as Cheryl also picks up her letters and
heads to the dining room table to read them. I sit James on my lap
and remove his coat and hat. He looks at me and smiles. “You want
me to read one of your letters from daddy?” 
    I reach over and pick one up from the top of
his pile.  
    James, I would move heaven and earth if I
could just be with you. Unfortunately, things happen and we must be
apart. I love you and miss you to heaven and back. I work hard
every day so I can see you for 15 minutes each week. Your smiles
and coos keep me going to the next week. Every week that passes is
one more week closer I am to being with you and your mother again.
Son, I love you, always and forever, Daddy.
    I decide I can’t read another letter from Max
right now, although I have been waiting for them for weeks. His
letters remind me of the pain he suffers being apart from us. I
have been so wrapped up in my own sadness that I have forgotten
about his. James squeals and it brings a smile to my face. “Did you
like daddy’s letter? Let’s get you fed and put down for a nap.” I
look over at Cheryl — she is crying. I can feel her pain. I grab a
box of tissues from the table and take them over to her before
taking James upstairs to feed him. 
    Later that night I lie in
bed and read some of Max’s letters. I cry and smile at the same
time. Neither Cheryl nor Danny shared their letters or the contents
of their letters with me. I didn’t ask and they didn’t
offer. Danny did ask if it would be ok if
they stayed an extra week, and I invited them to stay as long as
they want.    
    I haven’t seen Brooke lately, but I know her
parents are leaving to return home today. I text her to invite her
and her sons to dinner.  
    Emma: Did they
leave?  
    Brooke: Just
left.  
    Emma: Wanna come to dinner?
Max’s parents are still here for another week. I could use some
company, if you know what I mean.  
    Brooke: Are you sure? Three
extra people are a bit much.  
    Emma: Of course I’m sure.
I’ll be over to help you get the kids ready.  
    Brooke: That’s ok. As soon
as the baby wakes from his nap, we’ll be over. Thank
you.  
    Emma: That’s ok, Boo. I
love you.   
    I laugh at myself for some
stupid reason .   
    Brooke: Haha, very funny,
and I love you, forever and always.   
    Tonight for dinner, Danny and Cheryl offered
to pick up dinner from the Tilted Kilt Pub and Eatery. Max and I
love that place and often eat there with Jamison and Brooke. It’s
funny I am friends with Brooke and the other Army wives and yet we
each refer to the husbands by their last names. 
    After dinner Danny and
Cheryl leave, and Brooke and I have movie night with the kids. I
have missed my time with her and the kids. I cuddle up with Briley
while Brooke cuddles up with James as Braden cuddles in between us
with his small blanket and his bear. Once the old Disney
movie The Fox and the Hound is over, I help her carry her sleeping children
the short distance to their side of the duplex. 
    James and I go to bed and I leave the door
unlocked for Danny and Cheryl. Max will call tomorrow and I find
myself anxious for our skype time together. Our time last week was
cut short, and I am hoping we have better reception this
week.  
    I fall into a restless sleep
and dream of bombings, shootings, yelling, and minefields. I dream of soldiers being hit by flying
debris and flying body parts. I dream of Max and his platoon being in trouble. I
can’t see Max’s face, but I see the faces of the other soldiers in
his platoon. I wake up to Cheryl sitting on the edge of the bed and
I can hardly make out Danny in the hallway. The muted