Free Mayhem: The Order of the Wolf, Book 5 by Angela Addams

then motioned to the larger of the two couches behind them. “Why don’t we sit down?”
    Hannah’s frown deepened. She knew instinctively that Mayhem was deflecting something important but not understanding what.
    “Okay.” She walked to the couch and sat, instantly melting into the cushion, the black leather so soft she couldn’t help but rub her fingers over it again and again.
    Mayhem sat next to her, so close that almost every part of his body touched hers. She didn’t move away. She might have been wary, but she wasn’t going to deny she craved his touch.
    He turned toward her, quite unexpectedly wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her into his lap, her back pressed against his chest, her head naturally resting on his shoulder.
    “Everything I said to you the first night we met was true. I do believe in love at first sight and I am in love with you. Madly. Hopelessly. The past few weeks have been unbearable,” he said.
    Hannah gulped, her heart thudding, wanting so desperately to believe that, unable to at the same time. “I don’t know what to say. It all seems so…fast.”
    He nuzzled her neck and she wanted to give in to him, to get lost in his words, in his body. Love at first sight didn’t exist but infatuation did. That was all this was. They were attracted to each other—infatuation was easy to fall in to.
    “Mayhem.” She pulled away as best she could, moving her head to the side, shifting her neck away. “Stop.”
    He froze, his eyes blazing with intensity when she looked back at him. “I love you,” he whispered.
    She pulled further away, a part of her not wanting to leave but knowing she needed distance. She extricated herself from his warm touch and moved to sit on the chair opposite him. She wouldn’t say those words to him. They meant too much and he’d hurt her already, still hadn’t explained himself.
    “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t say that to me again.”
    He flinched and she felt kind of bad, but it needed to be said. His words were powerful—those words could make her melt. She needed to be strong. Mayhem was the wrong kind of man for her and he had secrets, she could feel it. She didn’t like secrets—they led to deception and then to broken hearts. Hers, her father’s. Love hurt too, especially when you gave it with your whole heart.
    “I can’t deny my feelings for you. You may not understand it but we’re meant to be together. I know you feel it too,” Mayhem said.
    Hannah licked her lips, her body shivering. She wanted it. God, how she wanted it. To be loved. To be cherished. “I’m not denying that I’m really, really attracted to you. I’ll admit that I—” she gulped as she scanned him “—I crave you. I think about you all the time.”
    He was smiling again, leaning forward so his solid forearms rested on his thighs, hands loosely clasped.
    “But that’s not love.” She shook her head when he opened his mouth to speak. “You said you would tell me everything. I’m willing to entertain the possibility of seeing you again, but only if I get a satisfying answer for your behavior.”
    He sighed, unclasped his hands, leaned back and looked her right in the eyes. “I left that morning before dawn because I had some commitments I couldn’t avoid.”
    “Commitments?” It was none of her business, really—who the hell was she to question him?—yet, she felt like that answer was the crux of whatever Mayhem was holding back.
    “This is going to have to be a two-way street, sweetheart. You say it’s not love. Fine, I say, you don’t get full disclosure until it is.” He cocked an eyebrow, daring her to argue.
    He was once again commanding, his attitude exuding power. It was the Mayhem from the first moment she had seen him the night of the launch party. The one that made her knees quiver with fear. His more vulnerable romantic side suddenly shielded by strength, power, control. Appealing,