months. I have my reservations too. Most women look at me and see dollar signs. She seems different though. She's in sports journalism and didn't even know who I was. Growing up, I learned if you want something bad enough you go for it. Whatever it takes, doubts be damned.
She snuggles her ass closer, resting it against my upper thighs as her light snoring touches my ears and I know she's asleep. Right now I think it's going to take time, distraction and a whole lot of convincing that what we could have is okay. Shit, I'm gonna need some convincing on that front too. Either our careers will make us stronger together or pull us apart. It's all a matter of opinion, really, and right now the only two that matter are ours.
I try to shut my brain off, the doubts trying to weasel their way deeper into my thoughts. Snaking their way into my happiness, like tendrils of smoke trying to choke out the positives. Maybe I do need some opinions, whether I want them or not. Maybe they'll dissuade my fears that she's justified in her worrying.
I slowly drift to sleep, holding her tighter against me, replaying our intimate... sex, love making, fucking? Whatever it was, it was amazing and I want so much more of it. Tomorrow's another day. Her moans and crying out to me is the last thing I remember before passing out, heavy for the night.
*****
My fists hit the bag hard.
I left Tanya sleeping peacefully in my bed. She looked too damn cute to wake up so early. Sure, I know she has to work this morning, but I should be back to my place before she wakes up anyway, being five am.
Not really sure what time she had an alarm set for, I left her a sweet note letting her know I had run to gym and that I'd be thinking about her while I was gone.
The gym is empty this early in the morning except for Sonjia, the one staff member that was here even before I was. She is in charge of keeping the place clean and making sure it doesn't stink like the occupants. I've seen her checking me out before and it never bothered me but for some reason, I'm bothered by it now. Feeling self conscious, I look away after noticing her watching me.
She's definitely pretty in a complete opposite from Tanya kind of way. For one she's taller than me. As for the rest, she's brunette where I prefer blondes and she's just too stick thin. I think anyone of my build would break her in half just kissing her. Not to mention she dresses just a little too skanky for my taste, especially when she's coming in to a gym for the sole purpose of cleaning. She has gold digger written all over her face. I'm not so full of myself or stupid to believe I'm the only one she checks out or shows interest in. She's most likely trying to sink her claws in any one of us or maybe more than one of us. She reeks of bad news and I would never want any part of it.
Wiping my face with my towel and draping it around my neck, I turn to hit up the treadmill and pull up short when she's standing right behind me, hand outstretched towards me.
“Oh. Sorry, I was going to ask how you're doing today Julian. I haven't seen you in a few days.” The look on her face as she licks her lips and stares boldly into my eyes tells me she may have had other intentions.
“I'm good. Have to get home to my girlfriend.” Why the fuck did I just say that? Right; to discourage her. I'm not disappointed by my earlier assessment of the situation when her face falls, looking like I've just stolen her favorite candy.
“You have a girlfriend? You've never mentioned her before.”
“We haven't been seeing each other long actually.” Her face lights up at my announcement. I decide to shut the door to her hopes in one swift statement. “Well we've known each other for a while and I've been interested from the start. So you could say I'm doing better than good, fantastic actually, now that she's agreed to be with me.” I paste a huge grin on my face. Who cares