Free Georgia On My Mind by Brenda Stokes Lee

the court!  What's going on in here?  This is a court of law.  What in the world is so funny?”
    The bailiff, who had a bird’s eye view of the tiger show, fought back laughter of his own. Finally he approached the bench and whispered something to the Judge.
    The Judge snickered to himself before he banged the gavel loudly, again. “I say, Order!  Order!  I will have order or I will clear this courtroom!  Counsel for the defense, please approach the bench.”
    The prosecutor is puzzled. “If it pleases your honor may I also approach?”
    “I'm not sure this concerns you, but under these unusual circumstances I will allow it.” The Judge remarked as he motioned for them to come forward.
    The two attorneys immediately approached the bench.  Charles is now in full view of everyone and his pants are literally flapping in the breeze. People continued to stifle their laughter despite the Judge's warning. 
    As Charles approached the bench the Judge noticed the large rip in the back of his pants and covers his mouth to conceal his own chuckles. “On second thought…  Both counsels please join me in my chambers. Court is in brief recess!” The Judge stated as he hit the gavel.
    The Judge rises to exit the courtroom. “All rise!” The bailiff chimes and everyone stands.
    Though a little puzzled, Charles confidently follows the Prosecutor and the Judge to the Judge's chambers.
    By now, everyone is standing to honor the Judge. No one breathed a single sound as Charles strutted out of the courtroom as if he was the king of England. However, the second the door to the Judge's chamber closed, the crowded courtroom erupted in robust laughter.
    ~*~*~
    The Judge immediately confronted Charles. “Mr. Preston I've literally seen enough.  What exactly are you trying to pull in my courtroom?”
    “Nothing Your Honor!  I don't understand what you mean?” Charles quickly replied, puzzled by the Judges accusation that he was up to something. 
    “So, you have no idea what I am talking about?” The Judge asked not really buying Charles’ sincerity.
    “No, Your Honor I am afraid I don't.” Charles innocently replied.
    “Okay, I'll try another approach.  Mr. Preston are you aware that your pants are ripped?” He asked. 
    “No Your Honor!  I mean, yes, Your Honor I was aware that there was a tiny rip in my pants… But my assistant assured me that it was not visible.” 
    “A tiny rip?  Mr. Preston is this some kind of shameless ploy to make the jury sympathetic to your client's case?”
    “No Your Honor, I assure you that it's not.  It's just a small hole.  I had no idea that it was even visible beneath my jacket.” 
    The prosecutor stifled his laughter as he quickly steals a glance at the back of Charles' pants. “Yeah, you’re right. It's hardly noticeable, Tiger.” He chuckled.
    The Judge snickered, cleared his throat and gives the prosecutor a “Tis, tis… Shame on you… No, No, No,” finger shake of disapproval before continuing. “So, Mr. Preston you’re trying to tell me that you have no idea that your pants are torn?”
    “No, your honor.  As I said it's just a tiny rip.  I don't understand what's going on.  Is there a problem Your Honor?”
    “Oh for God's sake man!  Your whole ass is hanging out!  And let the record show that tiger print is not a good look for you!” The Judge blurted out.
    The Prosecutor and the Judge simultaneously burst into laughter. The Judge playfully mimics a snarling, pawing tiger and the Prosecutor returns fire- snarl for snarl and paw for paw.  A cat fight ensues.
    “That's impossible.  This is a brand new suit!” Charles insisted, stunned and confused.  He feels around for the seat of his pants and feels his underwear and his thigh.  Horrified, he bolts for the bathroom.  A loud screech erupts. “Ah Hell No!” Charles could be heard screaming. “Oh My God!  Son of a Bitch!  What in the Hell! Damn! Damn! Damn! Oh Come On! Why Peaches,