Iâd gone from hero to zero without passing Go. He said he and Mom already knew about it, because after Iâd told Mrs. Lemons, sheâd told Principal Gupta, and sheâd told Dad, and Dad had told Mom. Now thereâs going to be a special assembly for the whole middle school on bullying and health and I donât know what else.
There was supposed to be a P-E-P rally next Tuesday, but it got postponed because of me. Kids like rallies more than assemblies, and I wonder how many people will know itâs my fault it got postponed.
Probably everyone.
I never want to go to school again.
I wonder if I can fake being sick until summer vacation.
AVA IN AGONY
2/19
5:30 P.M. IN THE LIVING ROOM
DEAR DIARY,
Dad asked if I wanted to go to the Great Wall or the Kahiki. I said Iâd rather stay home with Taco, and could we order in tacos? Dad said sure and sat down next to me on the sofa.
âThanks, though,â I said, and Dad patted my knee as if I were seven. He also said he had a cat joke for me:
Question: Whatâs the difference between a cat and a comma?
Answer: A cat has claws at the end of its paws, and a comma means a pause at the end of a clause.
I tried to smile, but I couldnât, partly because the joke wasnât very funny and partly because Iâm feeling too mopey.
Kelli once said her family likes to dine out on Friday, and what if I ran into Maybelle and Zara and Kelli in a restaurant, having a great time without me? I couldnât take it.
AVA, AILING
PS I thought I was Ava the Wise, but I amâ¦other wise .
2/19
BEDTIME
DEAR DIARY,
At dinner, while we ate takeout tacos, Pip said that her poster got ruined tooâand so did Beaâs! Someone gave Mona Lisa a beard and wrote âWiggle Wiggle Wiggleâ on her chest! And someone drew inappropriate private parts on Beaâs deer! And boogies under the deerâs nose! And someone gave Aesop sunglasses and a goatee!
I said the art poster vandals probably werenât the same girls who ripped down my FLASH poster because those girls would never have written âWiggle Wiggle Wiggleâ on Mona Lisa .
Pip said, âSo true, Nancy Drew!â which she used to say back when she was reading an old series about a girl detective. (Now sheâs reading a series about a lady detective. It starts with A Is for Alibi and B Is for Burglar , and thereâs a new book for every letter.)
We talked about who might have written on the posters.
We did not talk about stupid Kelliâs stupid sleepover.
Are Maybelle and Zara and Kelli hanging out in Kelliâs pink room? Are they eating chocolate-covered strawberries? Are they talking about Chuck? Are they talking about me ?
I wish I were having the sleepover.
And I wish Chuck werenât Kelliâs boyfriend, because if he werenât taken, maybe I could call him and he could help me feel better. I keep thinking about Rorie, and I do get some of what she and those girls were saying. But did they have to gang up on me five to one???
A IS FOR ALONE
2/19
TWENTY MINUTES LATER
DEAR DIARY,
I wanted to talk, so I walked into Pipâs room and said, âLife is not fair.â
Pip said, âNumber one, you should learn to knock. Number two, Iâm on the phone with Ben. And number three, life is fair ly fair for you and me. We have food and shelter, and you should have more perspective .â
I made a face and left. She didnât used to have any perspective, so who is she to criticize?
Writing things down usually helps, but tonight I also wanted to talk . Iâm only human. And only eleven.
AVA, ARRRGGGH
PS I wish Iâd never written those Tanya Tips. Iâm having a hard time not giving myself a hard time!
2/20
MORNING, SQUEAKY CLEAN
DEAR DIARY,
Iâm glad itâs Saturday. I donât have it in me to even think about going back to school yet.
I donât even feel like writing in you.
I feel like soaking in a hot bath