protection theyâd brought with them as they walked deeper into the blue-gold Mojave.
On the day they arrived in Joshua Tree, it was 106 degrees. They had never been to the desert. The boy could scarcely believe the size of the boulders, clustered under the enormous sun like dead red rockets awaiting repair, or the span of the sky, a cheerfully vacant blue dome, the desertâs hallucinatory choreography achieved through stillness, brightness, darkness, distanceâand all of this before noon. It was a big day, they agreed. It was a day so huge, in fact, that its real scale would always elude them. Neither understood that a single hour in the desert could mutate their entire future as a couple. In a sense, they will never escape this trail loop near Black Rock Canyon. They had prepared for the hike well, they thought, with granola bars, water, and an anti-UV sunscreen so powerful that its SPF seemed antagonistic. âAlbino spring break,â the boy said, rubbing the cream onto her nose. Theyâd heard about the couple who had died of dehydration six miles from where they were standing. They congratulated themselves on being unusually responsible and believed themselves to be at the start of a long journey, weightless spores blowing west.
The trip was a kind of honeymoon. The boy and girl were eloping. They werenât married, however, and had already agreed that they never would beâthey werenât that kind of couple. The boy, Andy, was a reader; he said that they were seafarers, wanderers. âEver unfixed,â a line from Melville, was scraped in red ink across the veins of his arm. The girl, Angie, was three years sober and still struggling to find her mooring on dry land. On their first date they had decided to run away together.
Andy bought a stupidly huge knife; Angie had a tiny magenta flashlight suspended on a gold chain, which she wore around her throat. He was twenty-two, she had just turned twenty-six. Kids were for later, maybe. They could still see the children they had been: their own Popsicle-red smiles haunting them. Still, theyâd wanted to celebrate a beginning. And the Mojave was a good place to launch into exile together; already they felt their past lives in Pennsylvania dissolving into rumor, sucked up by the hot sun of California and the perfectly blue solvent of the sky.
Theyâd been driving for three days; almost nobody knew yet that they were gone. Theyâd cashed old checks. Theyâd quit their jobs. Nothing was planned. The rental Dodge Charger had been a real steal, because the boyâs cousin Sewell was a manager at the Zero to Sixty franchise, and because it smelled like decades of cigarettes. Between them they had $950 left now. Less, less, less. At each rest stop, Angie uncapped the ballpoint, did some nauseating accounting. Everything was going pretty fast. By the time they reached Nevada, they had spent more than $800 on gasoline.
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Near Palm Springs they stop to eat at a no-name diner and nearly get sick from the shock of oxygen outside the stale sedan. The night before, just outside Albuquerque, they parked behind a barbecue restaurant and slept inside a cloud of meat smells. The experience still has the sizzle of a recent hell in Angieâs memory. Will they do this every night? She wants to believe her boyfriend when he tells her they are gypsies, two moths drunk on light, darting from the flower of one red sunset to the next; but several times sheâs dozed off in the passenger seat and awakened from traitorous dreams of her old bedroom, soft pillows.
After dinner Andy drives drowsily, weaving slightly. Sand, sand, sandâall that pulverized time. Eons ago the worldâs burst hourglass spilled its contents here; now the years pile and spin, waiting with inhuman patience to be swept into some future ocean. Sand washes right up to the paved road, washes over to the other side in a solid orange current, illuminated by their